So Bring me Home
by Desertfyre
Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home... *Edmund angst and sibling bonding*   Nominated in the Western Wood's People's Choice Awards
1. Prologue: The Letter

Disclaimer:  As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship.

A.N:  I've always wanted to do this story. I always had the ingredients I wanted to include, if you will, but not the recipe. It never flowed, until now! I was so happy when I sat back down and for probably the 5th or 6th try, it started flowing.

I'm not gonna say what the points I wanted to combine to make this story, cause then I'd give it away, so I'll probably talk more on that, at the end. But I will, say, major Edmund angst! Major, major Edmund angst. He's torturable and I'm harping on that as much as I can. Also there are a lot of Biblical parallels, so if you catch them, no you aren't crazy, that's exactly what I want, congrats. If not, just enjoy the story as it is.

Also, this is my 50th fanfic I've uploaded on this site! I joined tail end of 2009 and I finally arrived at 50 stories. I always assumed it would be a Supernatural story but lo and behold it's a Narnia story. Seems a little fitting as well. *throws confetti*

And if you've read some of my other fanfics, you know that I always clean up the mess I made and that the story is written out just give me awhile to upload. Might long while, since this is a long story. So without any further ado, I hope you enjoy!

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

* * *

><p>Prologue: The Letter<p>

_Dear False "King" Edmund:_

_This should come to no surprise to you. This isn't the first letter you've gotten is it? We know you haven't told your siblings about the letters. You probably think this is just an aggravating thing, but it seems you have some sense after all. We want to let you know your days are numbered. If you really think that you can get away with your sins you are gravely mistaking. _

_Believe me or not, but I'm here to tell you that it's the truth. You know very well that you are not the favorite king, you aren't even the favorite sovereign. You know that most Narnians are warier of you at best. Even after a year of reign and with good reason. Even you cannot dispute this fact.  
><em>

_A boy who was in league with the White Witch all of a sudden want to turn into a do-gooder and to add insult to injure, he was crown one of the four sovereigns? That is not our idea of justice. We have not a problem with your siblings, as you probably figured out since we've said nothing about them before now, but believe me, but we have a problem with you. _

_You've got 48 and some odd hours. _

_Your days are numbered. _

_Signed, _

_Narnians who wishes to see true justice prevail! _

_._

_._

_._

_._

_.  
><em>

Ten minutes after the letter was read, it was burned in the fireplace.

And 48 and a half hours later an arrow was released.

**TBC….**


	2. Ch 1: Fortyeight and a half hours later

Disclaimer:  As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship.

A.N: The beginning of the angst!

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

* * *

><p>Chapter 1: Forty-eight and a half hours later…..<p>

Edmund's mouth twitched with a hint of a smile as he watched Peter associate with some of the squirrels that had met their little parade. It was funny to watch Peter look on politely while trying to assimilate their typical fast talking speech. Only Edmund and maybe Orieus being as he was closest to the kings could see that Peter was slowly losing track of the conversation with his cousin squirrels.

It was close to the one year reign anniversary of the Kings and Queens of Narnia. The big celebration would be held in about two weeks from this day. For now there were many mini-celebrations going on. One of which the four sovereigns were participating in, although separately in pairs: the Kings on one end and the Queens on the other.

Many Narnians were coming to the big celebration that would held in about two weeks, but there were some for whatever reason would not be able to attend. So they were taking this week to go out and greet many of their people they came across. It was also a good chance to mingle with their fellow cousins. Since the land of Narnia was pretty vast and if all four sovereigns were together it would take twice as long, they decided that the Queens would start on one end and the Kings on the other. They, being the Queens, decided that when they met in what would be the middle of their route they would have a huge picnic. Peter and Edmund only rolled their eyes at this idea, but secretly they thought it was a good one. After a day of rest and the picnic they would continue on their way. The Kings greeting the people who already saw the Queens and vice versa.

Plus Peter and Edmund in particular didn't complain, because at least they were released from their duties and more importantly they didn't have to practice under Orieus watchful eyes. Granted they enjoyed it, most of the time, but it was still nice to get a vacation.

And this was considered a vacation compared to their other duties.

Edmund bite back a laugh as the squirrels were racing to get some nuts to give to Peter. The pile was growing by the second and Peter was trying to keep from looking flabbergasted.

"You are enjoying this way too much, King Edmund", Phillip spoke, eyeing his rider with amusement.

"How can I not, dear Phillip? I'm waiting to see how long it's gonna take Peter to politely to put a stop to this." Edmund answered.

It didn't take long before Peter spoke, "My dear cousins, I thank you for this abundance you have graced me with."

"We have more your highness, if you want it", one squirrel spoke.

"I do not wish to impose upon your storage." Peter broke in smoothly as a bag was handed to him and a reverently began placing the nuts he got into the bag, "That would not make me happy to take from you in such a way."

"Of course, highness", many of the squirrels chorus and bowed.

Peter gave a big smile as he stood up and gave a short wave before returning to his unicorn. He handed the bag to someone who took it to store it. He caught Edmund, who was standing next to Phillip, with his mouth pressed tightly together. Phillip himself snorted once.

Peter made a funny face at Edmund and included Phillip briefly as he groused quietly, "Oh, shut up." He swung up on his unicorn.

"I said nothing, brother", Edmund replied as he swung up on Phillip.

"Your face said it all", Peter pointed out as the party set out. The group of squirrels ran from tree to tree for awhile calling out various goodbyes. Peter smiled and waved as they went out of their sight then breathed a sigh of relief.

"I must say, I don't envy you there, Pete."

"Once again, shut up", Peter groused.

Edmund only laughed once. Peter smiled lightly. It was rare when Edmund found something funny enough to laugh and when he did, Peter enjoyed it. This first year was hard on Edmund. Actually it was hard on all of them, since they were getting use to their new duties and positions, but especially Edmund seemed to have the hardest time fitting in. Peter sometimes found Edmund with shadows in his eyes, that he would once again curse the White Witch for putting there.

Here lately, Edmund seemed to become tenser and more withdrawn making Peter keep a sharper eye out. When he was able anyway. Sometimes he had to make time to try to talk to his younger brother that seemed to slowly shut away. So far Peter hadn't managed to get a straight answer out of him. Actually, just something to work with would be nice, but so far he got zip. It made Peter himself a little tense, knowing something was going on but not knowing what. It was driving him crazy.

But when this little outing was announced and put into motion, at first Edmund seemed slightly against it. Peter didn't blame him. He knew that Edmund wasn't the most sociable out of the four of them and no one faulted him for that. But once they started out, Edmund seemed to relax more and more. Edmund seemed more relax than Peter found him to be in a long time. And that in turn made Peter more relaxed.

Peter frowned. Come to think of it, the squirrels were overjoyed and ecstatic to see him but they didn't say much beyond normal greetings to Edmund. They did not offer anything to the younger king. Edmund didn't seem to mind or be bothered by that, but the more Peter thought about it, the more it worked some of his nerves.

"If you stay frowned up like that, your face will freeze that way", came a voice breaking into his thoughts.

Peter blinked and looked at Edmund who sighed and said, "Earth to Peter. Anyone home?"

"I'm home", came the smart reply as Peter smirked.

"Oh good. That means we don't need to break and enter."

Peter forked an eyebrow, "Who is 'we'?"

"Me and Orieus, of course."

"Please do not drag me into this conversation, majesties", came the general's voice as he trotting on the other side of Peter.

Both young boys laughed. Peter gazed at Edmund long after their laughter died down.

"What?" Edmund snapped.

Peter just shook his head and looked straight ahead as they journeyed through the woods. Various dryad's were beginning to emerge from the trees surrounding them breaking out into song and dance, joyously greeting the Kings of Narnia. Both kings nodded to those around them.

One stepped forward and curtsied, holding out a wreath up towards the High King Peter, "My King, we would be honored if you would keep and wear this wreath."

Peter blushed but spoke, "I thank you, my good lady, for such an honor."

It took a moment of doing but Orieus stepped out of the way to allow the dryad placed the wreath around Peter's neck. He smiled down at her, just as another dryad was speaking to his brother. He was happy to see that Edmund got one, a bit smaller than his but no less grand. Edmund was blushing more than Peter was as he thanked the dryad, who was probably much younger than the other one, because she curtseyed, giggled and blushed.

The march continued and they stopped frequently and talked to the dryads and other various tree spirits who all greeted them joyously. It was going quite well although, Edmund was probably talked to much more than the other times.

Peter was secretly happy with this. Edmund needed to be talked to more. It took a little longer than the squirrels but they finally managed to move on, with many dryads calling their goodbyes and well wishes to the Kings.

Edmund let out a sigh.

"Too taxing for you, little brother?" Peter teased.

"I'm fine, big brother", Edmund shot back.

"I'm sure you are. You talked more than you did in the past several weeks alone", Peter teased lightly, though he hoped that maybe Edmund would give him something.

No such luck as Edmund snorted, "When there is something of substance to say, rest assured I shall say it, if not, then I shall not."

And that was that.

It was quiet for the moment as they continued their march. Edmund was lost in random thoughts of his, until sudden the hairs in the back of his neck stood up, straight and to attention. He broke out into a cold sweat as he looked around.

"What's wrong?" Peter asked as he stopped.

Phillip could feel Edmund shaking and stopped as well.

"You feel that?" Edmund asked.

"Feel what, King Edmund?" Orieus asked as he looked around, his keen eyes taking in everything. He signaled others of their entourage to be on alert.

"I….don't….know." Edmund answered.

"Then give us something to work with." Peter demanded.

Edmund ran a hand up and down his arm, feeling the goosebumps there. "Cold." Was all he was able to offer.

Peter frowned, "It's a pretty warm day."

The younger king shook his head, "Not that kind of cold."

Peter and Orieus exchanged glances. Just as quickly as it came it went away.

"It's nothing", Edmund murmured, embarrassed.

"If you feel something is off, then that makes it something", said Peter as he nodded to Orieus who repositioned the group to protect the Kings.

"This is highly unnecessary", Edmund muttered under his breath as he was able to straighten in his saddle.

"It's very necessary, my king", Orieus spoke up.

Peter eyed his little brother critically, making no move to budge, "You gonna be alright?"

Edmund sighed, "I'm fine. In fact….."

The Just King never got to finished what he said.

A twang whooshing sound resounded loudly in the forest making Peter freeze in absolute horror. In fact the entire entourage was shocked into stillness. Edmund's mouth opened and closed in resemblance of a fish as the blood drained from his face. Slowly his head lowered and he saw the arrow protruding out of his stomach. Jerkily he raised his stricken eyes to his brother, blood starting to dribble down his mouth. He could no longer support himself on top of Phillip's back as he slowly fell forward. It's what spurred the group into motion as it was Orieus who took the fast steps around Peter's ride to catch him.

"EDMUND!" Peter screamed as he scrambled off his ride.

"My King!" Phillip cried.

Orieus handed Edmund to Peter as the High King situated himself on the ground all the while barking orders and breaking off the longest part of the arrow. Phillp sat down, allowing Peter to use him as leverage as he held his brother. The Horse cringed his neck to look at his rider King.

Oreius, surveyed Edmund and he dared not pull out the arrow. The general had sent the faster rider in their group, another centaur under his command to go get Queen Lucy and the cordial. Said centaur was off almost as soon as Orieus' commands were out of his mouth. The general was rearranging the group for closer protection while some of the group broke off with Orieus in the lead in the general direction of where the arrow came from.

"Edmund, Edmund, hey, hey", Peter called shaking his little brother gently as he could, tears building in his eyes. He raised a hand and tapped Edmund's face repeatedly. "Wake up, Ed."

Edmund managed to pry his eyes open. "Pe..'er"

"Hey, hey, stay awake for me, okay. Lucy is coming, okay?" Peter ordered trying not to shake himself as he watched his younger brother's eyes roll around uncoordinated.

"Wha….'app'ned?"

Peter couldn't help the high pitched laugh as tears were starting to stream down his face, "An arrow."

Edmund closed his eyes.

Peter shook Edmund lightly, "Don't fall asleep on me Ed. Open your eyes. Come on, please open your eyes. Lucy will be here soon, just hang on."

To Peter's surprise which was starting to turn into this side of horror, Edmund started laughing. "What's so funny?" he asked cautiously.

"Ev'r'thing. Nu'thing", Edmund laughed then hissed.

"Don't tax yourself, okay?"

Edmund managed to find his older brother's eyes. He opened his mouth and closed it a few times, his throat working convulsively, "I'm….so'ry", he muttered.

"Sorry for what?" Peter asked wanting to keep Edmund talking.

To keep him hanging on.

The shadowed looked, that Peter had come to loathe, began to reappear in Edmund's eyes. Edmund didn't answer making Peter shake him lightly again. "For what?" he repeated.

Edmund just looked really sad. Sadder than Peter had ever seen him and it scared him. Edmund blinked slowly, "Ju't….'orry."

Peter couldn't keep the tears from flowing faster as he closed his eyes briefly. When he opened them, he saw Edmund looking at him closely.

Too closely with a blank look.

"Edmund?" he asked his voice a thin thread of a sound. He shook him and his younger brother's seemed so still.

Too still.

"Ed?" Peter's voice was steadily rising in octave, "Edmund? Edmund, come on. Don't do this to us. Please. Ed. Ed! No…no….nononono. Please. Aslan, please." Peter began to shake his brother harder as the tears starting falling faster. "No…I….."

The group watched in horror and sadness at the situation as their High King began to fall apart and their worst nightmare come true. Phillip turned away from the scene lowering his head to the ground, shutting his eyes.

.

.

.

The Just King was dead.

**TBC….**


	3. CH 2: Day One: Suspicions

Disclaimer:  As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship.

A.N: I suggest getting the nearest stuff animal and holding it.

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

* * *

><p>Chapter 2: Day One- Suspicions<p>

Queen Lucy had arrived seven minutes too late to the heartbreaking scene of Peter still holding Edmund but he had checked out. Phillip lifted his head when he saw the Queen approach. Tears still flowed down Peter's cheeks as he stared blankly down at his dead younger brother. Lucy immediately began crying as he realized that the cordial couldn't raise the dead. Even when she threw her arms around Peter he didn't blink nor register that she was there.

Ten minutes after that Susan came and she too tried to get Peter to say something or acknowledge her but she got nothing as well. Phillip joined in trying to get a response from the High King. He even tried moving his body that Peter was sitting against, but Peter didn't response to that either.

Oreius had returned before Susan having not found anything at that moment to see that Edmund was dead and Peter was off somewhere. Lucy begged Orieus to get Peter to say something and the general tried his best but Peter didn't even blink.

Word got around the kingdom of Narnia really quick about the death of the Just King. Most were outraged by what happened and grief-stricken by such a thing. And horrified that someone attempted an assassination and completed it. The fact that such a thing could happen in Narnia, and this being the first time that they knew about, was horrifying to all parties. Orieius was determined to bring whoever it was to justice. And if it was a conspiracy among a group he was determined to find that out as well.

The Queens were stricken with grief but Peter just seemed to have checked completely out. In fact in their somber return back to Cair Paravel Peter hadn't said anything. He barely blinked as it was. It took some doing to pick up Edmund out of Peter's arm as whenever anyone tried to, he held on fiercely, but his face never changed.

When they got back to Cair Paravel, Edmund's body was taken away to be cleaned up. Susan and Lucy tried their hardest to get Peter to snap out of it, to say or do something.

Anything.

Even with the help of his valet, a faun named Tirail, none of them could get Peter to do respond to anything. Tirail, with the help of a few other male servants, managed to clean up the High King who didn't even seem to realize what was happening.

It was only when he was cleaned and in some loose fitting clothes that weren't sullied with his brother's blood that Peter started coming to.

"Peter", Susan murmured gently as Peter started twisting his head this way and that.

"Peter?" Lucy questioned as she was holding Peter's hand.

"Where's Edmund?"

That question hurt the girls as they each felt a slice of pain run through them. They exchanged pained looks.

"What do you remember?" Susan asked cautiously.

Peter cocked his head, "Riding. Cold…" He blinked and then he began to look panicked. He shot up from his seat on his bed.

"Peter, please", Susan cried.

"Where is Edmund?" Peter repeated.

"Peter!" Lucy cried as she stood up.

"Where is Edmund?" Peter all but screamed.

"They are cleaning him up. And when they're done….."Lucy's soothing voice cracked as she clasped her hands together, holding them over her mouth to try and stifle the sobs.

"What?" Peter asked eerily calm.

Susan picked up where her younger sister left off, "They are gonna…gonna put him….in the….in the….coffin and lay him in the tomb reserved for us when we…."

"NO!" Peter cried.

"Peter?" Lucy questioned, wiping away the tears, as Susan started crying.

"No! I want Edmund here! He will stay here!" Peter cried walking to the door.

"But, Peter…Edmund is….oh Aslan, Edmund is dead!" Susan broke into a fresh wave of crying.

Peter whirled around and pointed at her, "Do not say that! NEVER say that! Edmund isn't dead! He isn't! He isn't! I'm not gonna let him be buried, it's too soon! He will stay here! And I will stay with him until his stubborn little behind decides to wake up!"

"Peter…..Peter…..that isn't…."

But said male cut off his older sister, "I won't hear of it anymore! Edmund will be brought here to my room and that's final! You better start praying to Aslan or something because I will not bury my brother because he isn't dead! There are four thrones, do you get that? You want to make it two?"

"PETER!" both sisters cried simultaneously, realizing the implication of what their older brother was saying. Susan jolted from her place on the bed.

Peter threw open the door and called for a guard explaining his wishes.

"Peter, please think about this. We miss Edmund too!" cried Susan stepping forward, trying to beg some reason into Peter.

"There is nothing to think about!"

"No, Peter has a point", Lucy murmured making her older sister spin around to face her.

"What?"

"No, I mean. We need Aslan. We need to talk to him! Something! Beg him to fix this! Something, anything!" Lucy explained.

"You think he could?" Susan wanted to believe that but she didn't want to get her hopes up looking for such a miracle.

Lucy glared through her tears at her older sister, "He's Aslan! He can do anything!"

"But will he?"

Lucy was silent.

"He will", Peter spoke up his voice way too calm.

"He will?" Susan questioned.

Peter nodded jerkily as he leaned back against the wall. "He has too." He slide down the wall and brought his knees to his just, "He just has too. It can't end this way. It can't."

Tentatively, Lucy was the first to move and sit next to Peter, leaning her chin on him. Susan moved next sitting on the other side. They were all silent, each one sending prayers winging to Aslan.

* * *

><p>"Come on, Edmund, please wake up", Peter begged for the umpteenth time that day. He didn't know how long it had been since they brought Edmund's body back to Peter's room and positioned him comfortably under the covers. They had cleaned him up and put him in better garb. For all the world he looked asleep.<p>

Peter hadn't moved from his spot next to Edmund, hugging his younger brother's body to him. He alternated between begging Edmund and begging Aslan.

"Aslan, please, don't do this to me. To us. To Edmund. Hasn't he been through enough? And now to get killed in such a manner! What justice is this? You died for him and he dies almost a year into our reign. Please, please, you cannot be this heartless. How can we survive without our brother? You cannot ask this of us. You cannot ask it of me." Peter murmured under his breath, his eyes staring at Edmund almost unblinkingly.

Silence was the only greeting he got. He shut his eyes and wiped away the stray tears. Some part of him was amazed that he still had tears.

He sniffed, "Come on, Edmund. Don't you think, you've proven your point? Time to wake up!" His voice broke as he buried his face in Edmund's neck, "Please….." His other hand, that was thrown over Edmund's chest, found its way to Edmund's hair to clutch at it tightly.

* * *

><p>Lucy sniffed as she was sitting on the other side of the door. Most of the time, she couldn't hear exactly what Peter was saying but she felt the raw emotion in it. Susan was standing her back to the wall, looking up at the ceiling rather absently.<p>

The two guards were a respectful distance away, neither one disturbed by a queen sitting on the floor.

"Please Aslan", Lucy murmured under her breath, "You cannot want this for us. Want this for them. Please, answer us. Come here or send someone or something. Just send a sign, any sign. Please Aslan, let your will be done, but I pray this isn't it."

Susan looked down as she heard some hoof-steps. Oreius walked towards them inclining his head. "I hate to bother any of you in this trying time…."

"Of course, what is it?" Susan asked as Lucy only glanced up once.

Oreius was silent a moment before asking, "Have you seen Geramius?"

Susan blinked, "Edmund's valet?"

"Yes, we've been looking for him, and he is nowhere to be found."

A cold chill ran through each Queen. It was Lucy who looked up at Oreius. "What are you saying?" she asked softly.

Oreius went silent.

"You think he may have something to do with this?" Susan choked out.

"I'm leaving nothing out in terms of suspicion", Oreius finally spoke, "I wish to place trusted guards with both of you and your brothers, just to be on the safe side."

Susan nodded, "Do what you have to do, Oreius."

Oreius bowed before turning and leaving.

"Do you really think that Geramius was…..was part of a…..conspiracy?" Lucy asked her voice breaking.

"Like Oreius says, we leave nothing not looked at. Plus it is suspicious, that he disappears at this time. Though I can't believe that he…" Susan stopped shaking her head trying not to cry anymore.

Lucy looked up at her older sister. "Do you…..think we should tell Peter?" she asked uncertainly.

The Gentle Queen shook her head, "Leave him alone. We don't know anything of substance right now. No sense in getting him worked up. The slightest thing might set him off. We need to be careful."

Lucy nodded slowly.

* * *

><p>Peter looked out noticing that the sun was setting. Normally such an event moved him especially in Narnia, but that day, it didn't move him.<p>

He only watched with sadden eyes.

"Please…." Was all he murmured.

**TBC…**


	4. CH 3: Day Two: A Sign slow in the making

Disclaimer:  As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship.

A.N: Nothing to say.

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

* * *

><p>Chapter 3: Day Two- A Sign slow in the making<p>

What was supposed to be a happy time was now a sad time. Cair Paravel no longer had a jubilant air about it, even on its so-called uneventful days. The hallways, so rich with bright colors, seemed to dim, in respect, to the cold air that flowed throughout it.

The Queens spent most of their time trying to run the kingdom, speaking to a few that came to offer condolences. They were both vividly aware that two of the four thrones weren't filled. It was almost painful to go into the throne room and it was getting to the point where Lucy in particular was beginning to get physically ill when she walked by the room. When they didn't have to run business, that needed their attention they spent a lot of time in their own rooms. Sometimes they sat with Peter who hadn't moved from his spot next to Edmund. A rare time at night found all four curled up in the big bed.

The High King Peter hadn't been seen by anyone but his sisters since his self imposed reclusiveness. Even when they were in the room, he said nothing, just continuing to hold Edmund and mumble under his breath.

The general exhausted every resource he could to find the missing valet and to find the culprits responsible. True to his word, two trusted guards were stationed outside the High King's room at all times. And a trusted bodyguard was stationed to each Queen. Since either sister was rarely without the other these days, it doubled the protection which was good.

* * *

><p>Peter only stared blankly even as he heard the door ease open. "Peter?" Susan called.<p>

He heard rustling and soft clinking but he didn't shift in acknowledgment.

"Peter?" Lucy tried.

"Peter, you need to eat. When was the last time you ate?" asked the oldest Queen, gently.

"Please, eat something" Lucy urged when the High King said nothing then she amended, "Please say something."

Silence grated on the ears of both girls.

"I've been praying almost non-stop to Aslan. He hasn't sent a sign yet, but we have to believe its coming", Lucy spoke up to break the silence.

Peter twitched at this shifting.

Susan spoke hesitantly, "I have as well. I want to believe something…..good can come out of this." She would not wish for the impossible no matter how probable. Though there was as small part of her that wished to Aslan himself.

There was a brief pause before Susan begged, "Come on, take a bite of something. A sip of something, anything."

"I'm not hungry", came the mumbled reply.

"Please, something", Lucy pleaded.

"I'll eat when Edmund wakes."

"….." Neither young girl knew what to say to that as they exchanged stricken glances.

"Then, we'll leave this here. Please try to eat something. Edmund would not want you to be like this", said Susan.

"When Ed wakes, I'll eat", came the repeated reply.

Susan nodded clumsily as she and Lucy turned and walked out the door, pausing to give a lingering glaze towards their brothers before shutting the door quietly behind them.

"Please, Aslan, why haven't you come or sent a sign yet?", Peter muttered, "Can't you hear us? Hear me? Please. It's been….how many days…..hours I don't know. Please, grace us with something. Anything. Please….."

* * *

><p>"Do you really think Aslan is gonna come?" Susan asked breaking the silence that lingered in the sitting room.<p>

Lucy paused in all her movements, which wasn't much as she looked up from her window sill seat to Susan who was sitting attempting to read a book.

"Why would you ask such a question?" Lucy asked her voice eerily calm.

Susan glanced up at Lucy before looking at her book. She shook her head.

"Susan", Lucy drew out her sister's name.

Said girl sighed and closed the book, "It's just….it's been what? Two and a half days and still there isn't a sign! I mean if Aslan was going to do something or come wouldn't he already?"

"His time is not ours." Stated the Valiant Queen.

"Lucy, Edmund is….he's dead. There I said it! He's dead, do you get that? He's dead and Peter's on the verge of a breakdown or meltdown. He refuses to move from Edmund's side, refusing to say he's dead." Susan normally gentle voice was taking on a air of hysterics.

Lucy was still calmly listening as Susan popped up from her seat and paced, "Everything is falling apart, Lu! We both know that if something doesn't happen soon we'll lose not only Edmund but Peter as well. Didn't the prophecy say, four thrones have to be filled? Maybe my math isn't right, but last I checked we are down definitely by one throne and temporarily and I foresee it becoming permanent by two. We can't do this by ourselves! And Aslan has to know this! He's got to but he's been silent for all this time! What are we suppose to do?" she cried stopping and facing Lucy in a helpless gesture.

Lucy said nothing but stare at her.

"LUCY!" Susan cried.

"Are you done?" Lucy asked suddenly looking older than her ten years.

Susan blushed and tried to get herself together and gracefully sitting back down on the couch. She nodded, as she just realized that tears had tracked down her face and proceeded to wipe them away. She was now ashamed that she had lost it, like that, but it had been building up all this time.

Lucy stood up and walked over and sat next to Susan taking her hand. "Susan, calm down and breathe."

Susan obeyed her little sister, taking in deep breathes.

"Good. Now. Aslan knows all of this and he'll do what's best. I can't even fathom to guess why this is happening nor why he hasn't said anything or sent a sign, but he works in his own time. You know that. I don't know what Aslan has planned but I will continue to call him and pray and hopefully we'll get an answer sooner rather than later. I know an answer is coming but when is the question."

"How do you know it's coming?" Susan asked looked through teary eyes at her younger sister.

"I believe with all my heart it is."

Susan looked skeptical, "That's it?"

"Faith is believing without seeing." Lucy stated simply.

Susan nodded, "I know. I'm sorry, Lucy that I went lost it like that. I just….."

"I know. It's okay." Lucy hugged Susan.

"What about Peter?" asked Susan, "Is it not healthy what he's doing?"

"No, but he has to work through it his way. This is the only way he knows how. I know it'll get better. I know it will. We just have to wait on it. Even if it's a long time."

"You think it will be?"

"I don't know, I just know it's coming." Lucy pulled back and looked her sister in the eye. "You gonna be okay?"

Susan nodded even as more tears spilled out of her eyes. She noticed that Lucy's were slowly filling up with tears. "Oh Lucy!" she cried pulling her sister back into a hug.

Somewhere, they both found each other sobbing.

"I know it's coming, but still….when I think about all this…." Lucy trailed off.

"I know. We just have to keep pleading to Aslan." Susan cried.

"Please, Aslan. Hear us! Send us something to work with. Anything. Please. In your name, we pray." Lucy cried.

"In your name", Susan repeated.

They sat like that for a long time murmuring their prayers to Aslan and together calming down. They didn't know how long it was when a knock resounded.

"Come in", Susan called wiping her tears.

Lucy was wiping her own tears as Oreius stepped through. Both Queens tried to collect themselves and Oreius waited patiently with sad eyes.

"Uh…..sorry. Um…." Susan could not articulate well at that moment so she shut up turning to look in front of her, out the window.

Lucy fared a little better, "Please come in. What do you have for us?" she asked, looking over the back of the couch they were sitting in facing the window.

Oreius paid his respects, "My Queens, we thought we'd keep you updated."

"We thank you." Susan managed to say, over her shoulder.

"We have found Geramius", the general stated gravely.

"And?" Susan asked turning to look over the couch at the centaur.

"He was trying to escape our borders into what was once the White Witch territory. We had some Birds that saw this and alerted us to this. We currently have him in a holding cell. He was questioned hard and finally confessed to being part of the conspiracy and that there were others. He refused to give us any more than that. But fortunately, many Narnians have been eager to help out. Many of the dryads were searching for clues and have alerted us to some. They are greatly disturbed that it happened in their backyard essentially and are appalled to think they have a stray dryad among them that would participate in this. I'm heading out now and hopefully we are one step closer to bringing justice to our King."

Lucy and Susan both nodded.

"Keep us posted, general." Susan re-ordered firmly.

Oreius nodded and bowed, "I shall, my queens." Then he left.

There was silence for a long while before Lucy voiced a thought in her head, "See? One step closer. Maybe this is part of a sign. A sign that is coming together slow in the making."

Susan nodded ready to believe in anything.

**TBC….**


	5. CH 4: Day Three: On the Edge

Disclaimer:  As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship.

A.N: Enjoy.

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

* * *

><p>Chapter 4: Day Three- On the Edge<p>

By now three long days have passed, each seeming harder than the last. The Queens had managed to put their foot down and have Peter sip/nibble something and go wash up but he did so quickly so he could get back to Edmund. He barely left Edmund's side. It seemed to go on like this until the dusk of the third day.

Nothing stirred in the High King's room. There was no sound as silence drifted throughout. Peter had long ago stopped talking; almost stop thinking, his mind numb. He couldn't even conjure a worthwhile thought.

Edmund's body was cold although such a thing didn't even phase the eldest brother, as he continued to hold on tight. His eyes drifted, heavy and closed with a flutter.

They fluttered back open as he heard the door ease open. "Peter? Oreius wants to talk to you." Called Lucy.

Peter closed his eyes as he heard soft hoof-steps.

"My King?" came the gentle voice of the general.

Peter didn't even move, for all the world looking like he didn't hear him.

Oreius glanced at the Queens who were shooing him to continue. The centaur took a breath, "I thought, you'd want to know, majesty that we've been putting everything into finding out…..who did this."

That made Peter shift once, his eyes fluttering, though the trio couldn't see that.

"…..Thanks to much help we managed to find the culprits. They are currently being held in prison."

Peter's eyes flew open, as to all of their surprise he shot up and turned his head to look at Oreius with a raised eyebrow as if asking if it was true. Oreius nodded though he looked worriedly at his young monarch. Peter stared at the general a long moment before throwing back the covers.

"Wait! What are you doing?" Susan asked. Even though she wanted Peter to have more of a reaction to anything than he had in days, her stomach bunched up in a knot. She had a bad feeling about this.

As did Lucy who asked as Peter stood up and had to steady himself, "Where are you going?" she asked anxiously.

Oreius was silent but worried as he watched the oldest monarch not say anything as he made his way to the door and threw it open.

"Peter!" cried Susan, pulling on Peter's arm.

"Let me go, Susan", Peter hissed, his voice a little hoarse.

"Where are you going?" she enunciated slowly.

"Where do you think?"

"I'm asking cause I don't know!"

"I'm going to kill them!"

"WHO!" both queens chorus shocked that such a thing came out of Peter's mouth.

"Who do you think?" snapped Peter.

Lucy caught on fast, "The….. assassins?" her stomach rebelled at such a word, but that is what they were.

Peter just grunted as he pushed Susan away and made his way down the hall. The two guards looked surprised, uncertain and worried as they watched the High King make his way down the hall.

"Peter!" Lucy and Susan cried running up to said male, each trying to grab their brother's arm. Peter kept twisting away from them.

"Let me go! They killed Edmund!"

"So you are gonna just kill them, without even a trial or letting them state their case or whatever it is they have to say?" Lucy questioned.

"They don't have a case!" Peter blazed.

"That is not how Edmund would operate and you know that!"

"Edmund is still…." Peter still couldn't say it. "He's not present at the moment! And it's their fault. I'm going to kill them!"

Susan cried, "You can't mean that!"

"I do mean that! Move!" Peter yelled pushing Susan and Lucy away who were in tears. He ambled down the long hallway.

"He won't listen to us!" Susan cried.

"Allow me", Oreius murmured and the two girls nodded their faces white with fear as Oreius walked briskly to catch up to Peter who wasn't very far.

"Go away, Oreius", Peter hissed when said general was right behind him, trailing behind him as he walked down the hall.

"My king, you do not really mean what you say."

"Why won't you people stop telling me what I don't mean to say! I know what I said! I said I'm gonna kill them and I am!"

"Do you think Edmund would want this?"

"Edmund isn't present at the moment!"

"This I know, my king, but you cannot do this thing. It's not right. Revenge is not right."

"Who said anything about revenge Oreius?"

"What do you called it High King Peter?"

"Shut up and go away!" snapped Peter avoiding the question.

"Nay, my king."

Peter narrowed his eyes stopping momentarily. He didn't look at the general, "You aren't obeying my orders."

"I'm more concerned for your well being right now then your orders. You aren't in your right frame of mind, majesty."

"I don't remember asking your opinion", Peter's voice was pure ice as he started to continued down the hall.

Oreius hated to do what he did next but he would not allow this on this watch. So he reached out and grabbed Peter's arm. Peter pushed his hand away as expected.

"Don't touch me!"

"So what are you gonna do? March to prison and run your sword through them?"

"I was thinking about hacking them to pieces but yes."

A shiver ran through Orieus, "And what would Edmund say to such a bloodthirsty idea? He would not be pleased."

"Because of them he's….." Peter choked up on the word, "….asleep! I'm not letting them get away with this!"

"No one said anything about letting them get away with anything…" the general stated firmly, "…but let's do this the right way. Going in like this, is not the right way! You know it! What would Aslan think?"

Peter stopped trying to push the general's hand away at this and Oreius dared to hope. "Aslan would not want this." the centaur murmured.

Peter was silent a moment before he managed to bite out, "Aslan isn't here."

"Yet." Oreius added firmly, "He isn't here yet."

Peter finally looked up at Oreius his eyes narrowed, "It's been three days."

"I know. I know this is hard, but live up to what Aslan expects. What Edmund expects. Neither one would want this, you know what. Edmund was the Just King for a reason."

"And look how well that turned out." The High King snorted, "No, Oreius, I like my plan better."

Peter walked on but suddenly found himself blocked by Oreius. He was a little stunned as he just stare for a second at the large body that blocked his way. After a second he tried to walk about Oreius but said centaur just moved continuously blocking his way. Finally having enough, Peter dared to glare up at the centaur with a pure murderous rage that was normally reserved for his enemies. Oreius shivered inside at such a look directed at him but he would not budge.

"Since when does any of us ultimately follow our own plan? Aslan has a plan although we know not what it is. Sometimes our faith is tested in times of great turmoil like now and we have to persevere. I know you miss your brother and you are outraged by what has happened, as are we all."

"Get out of my way, Oreius", Peter growled.

"No."

They had a stare off until Oreius crossed his arms, "If you want to do this, you are going to have to go through me." Although his voice was soft, they both knew he meant what he said.

He saw Peter survey him if trying to figure out a way around him. Then he saw his King falter once and then he bit out, "Move."

"No." Oreius was resolute in his stance. His tail flicked behind him, "Now listen to me." Here Peter rolled his eyes but didn't say anything as the centaur continued praying to Aslan for strength and the right words to get through to his young monarch, "Edmund is your brother and a fellow king as you are a king; he would want you to act like the High King we all know you to be; that he knows you to be. To go down there and just kill them so without mercy, is neither your way, nor your brother's way and certainly not Aslan's way. Your sisters would be devastated; they are frightened to think you would do this. Don't sink to the assassinator's level, rise above it. Don't give them this satisfaction."

He saw another flicker across Peter's face, his mouth pressed firmly together, his glare wavering as tears began to cloud in his eyes. Peter's gaze turned to a point on the wall, burning hole through it.

"You have a choice, but I pray to Aslan you make the right one."

"Are you done?" Peter managed to get out between his teeth.

Oreius stared down at Peter. "Fine, don't do it for Edmund, maybe not even for Aslan himself, but do it for you. You know as well as I do, it may not be five minutes after the fact, it may not be tomorrow, maybe not even next week or next year, but if you take this course of action, you will regret it. You know that. Would this really make you feel any better? Can this course of action change the situation for the better? Is this what justice looks like? Is this what we want Narnia to be like? Think deeply on this, my king."

He saw Peter lower his gaze to the ground and swallowed.

"I'm begging you on behalf of Narnia, myself, your sisters, your brother and even for your own well-being, do not do this. I know you want to and believe me I resisted the urge to tear them apart myself when I first laid eyes on them, but I know it's not going to do any good for the greater good. Let us wait on a clear sign from Aslan before we make any decisions on what to do with them. Please."

"Move?", Peter's voice this time came out in more of a pleading voice.

"Nay, my King. I can't. I don't want to fight you, but if I have to for your own good, I will." Came the quiet but truthful voice.

And it went without saying that Peter wouldn't be able to fight Oreius. Not even on Peter's best day did he hope to overcome Oreius. That was the reason he was the general. What's more Peter didn't want to fight a dear friend. He didn't even know what he wanted anymore. He didn't even know which way was up and which way was down anymore. Tears spilled over his cheeks as he felt hesitant hands come to rest on his shoulders.

"I miss him." Peter sounded like the fifteen year old he was, "If he was gonna…..he shouldn't have that way. He can't be…..d-d-d-dead. He can't." His hands flew up to face as a pair of arms wrapped around his shoulders.

"I know. I miss him too. And he shouldn't have….died that way", Oreius murmured.

Peter started sobbing. The first real cry he had since the day Edmund was assassinated so brutally. "He can't be gone! I mean, Aslan has to fix it, doesn't he? He can't have brought us here, just to have this happen. And to Edmund? What did he ever do to deserve this? He's already been through a lot. Can't he be cut a break? Aslan has to have a good end in sight here, doesn't he, Oreius?" Peter banged on said male's chest when he didn't get an answer fast enough to suit him. "Doesn't he?"

"I pray, hope and believe it so." Came the answer.

"I want to believe it too." Peter sobbed, "I want to believe it."

"Then believe it." Was the simple answer.

But both knew it was easier said than done.

**TBC….**

* * *

><p>A.N: Awww, poor Peter, he lost it! Finally had his breakdown or meltdown, whichever you want to go with.<p>

I'm not surprise as it was building up in him, I imagine.

Man, even I'm depressed with all this crying and sadness and whatnot.

I miss Edmund!


	6. CH 5: Day Four: Hope Comes

Disclaimer:  As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship.

A.N: Please enjoy!

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

* * *

><p>Chapter 5: Day Four- Hope Comes<p>

After Peter managed to calm down a bit, Oreius escorted him back to his room, where Lucy and Susan were waiting apprehensively. When they saw Peter enter, Oreius had to hold Peter up when his two sisters tackled him each talking over each other. Then Lucy was attached to Oreius thanking him over and over for managing to get through to Peter. Susan was a bit more composed as she nodded and said her thanks before sending for some food for them to eat. Oreius excused himself, once Lucy managed to detach herself from him.

Once the food was ordered, they managed to get Peter to eat some and wash up before getting back in bed, resuming his position of hugging Edmund's lifeless body. The Queens looked on sadly before retiring for that night, each wondering when the end in sight was.

The next day was much of the same. They managed to get a few more words than normal out of Peter and a decent meal before they retreated this time to the gardens. Susan felt they needed some fresh air. They tried to get Peter to come but he wouldn't hear of it. So Susan opened the balcony doors allowing the cool breeze to float in. The see-through lacy curtains blew gently by the wind.

Susan was leaning against a tree, shifting through a book, whose dryad did come out and say a few words before retreating knowing the Queens wanted some alone time. Lucy laid staring up at the clouds not really seeing them, as she continued her litany of prayers to Aslan. She was trying to be patient but it was really hard at times. She alternated between begging, pleading and quietly asking in her prayers.

Neither one knew how long it was they sat in the garden, before they each felt a sense of peace still throughout them. Lucy was the first to notice as she shot up to her feet and looked around. She didn't know what she was looking for until she saw him.

"Aslan!" she cried before rushing over and tackling him.

Aslan laughed a lion's laugh as he fell over to the side. Susan had to get herself together to realize what she was seeing before she suddenly found herself snuggling into Aslan's mane along with Lucy. Both started crying somewhere amidst the joy of seeing the Great Lion again.

"Why do you both cry?" Aslan asked.

"We've been calling for you for seeming so long now…", Susan was the first to answer not lifting her head, "Why didn't you come sooner?"

"All things happen in its good time."

"Are you gonna fix this?" Lucy asked looking up at Aslan.

"Sometimes fixing things my way, may not be your way." came a warning that was not really a direct answer.

"Oh, please, Aslan. You have to do something. Peter momentarily lost it the other day. I don't know how much longer we are gonna survive this way."

Aslan stood up with Lucy and Susan following him. "You must trust me, dear ones. Everything always works out for the good."

Both girls nodded as Aslan started walking back into the castle. He was greeted by many of the Narnians in the castle, all in whatever way they were best suited. Even Oreius who had heard that the Great Lion was here, greeted him as Aslan made his way to Peter's room.

"Go and rest, daughters. I will send Peter along in a few moments", Aslan ordered.

Susan nodded as Lucy hugged the Lion before they walked back to their rooms.

Peter absently watched the curtains flow in the breeze, his eyes half-lidded as he heard the door slowly open. He thought it was either or both of his sisters so as usual he didn't bother to move. It wasn't until a sense of peace stole within him that his head shifted. He saw gold out the corner of his eye as Aslan walked around the bed to sit directly in Peter's line of vision.

Peter blinked rapidly as his voice caught not quite believing what he saw. That he dared to hope it was who he saw, "Aslan?"

"Peter."

"I-I-I….." Like his sisters he started crying, shutting his eyes, turning his face into Edmund's shoulder.

And like he asked his sisters, Aslan asked Peter, "Why do you cry?"

"I'm glad you're here! We've….I've been praying, calling to you. Why didn't you answer?"

"I have answered, just not on your time table."

Peter let out a little laugh and nodded. It was so like Aslan. He always answers but not when you want him to. But Aslan knew best and would always know best.

"Edmund….he's…" Peter choked out hugging said brother to him, "He's dead! They killed him! Surely, he wasn't supposed to die like that. Not that way! Not so soon."

Aslan cocked his head, "Peter…."

Said young man opened his eyes and looked at the Lion. "Who said he was dead?"

"….." Peter didn't know what to say.

"You said it yourself, before. He is not dead, he's merely asleep."

Peter blinked, "….." he was getting confused really fast. His sluggish brain was barely keeping up.

"Peter, my child, gather you a change of clothes and go to your sister's room. I will come for the three of you in a little while. Until then, rest."

Peter paused momentarily before slowly detangling himself from his brother and obeying, gathering some clothes in his arms and walking to the door. He opened it and glanced back at Aslan and his brother before nodding and walking out, shutting it behind him.

The curtains moving with the gentle breeze broke the stillness that followed.

Aslan looked back at Edmund, "You can wake up now, my son." He said simply.

Slowly obeying the Great Lion's words, color began to return to Edmund's cheeks and his fingers began to twitch. Followed by his head and then his eyes. Then finally a low moan came from the young boy's mouth. It took a few moments before Edmund could pry his eyes open and took a few more moments for them to focus.

"Sit up", came the command.

As if on accord, Edmund's body sat up, the covers pooling in his lap. He looked rather blank for a bit before his eyes blinked rapidly. He looked around until his eyes connected with Aslan's figure.

"A'an?" he questioned his voice hoarse, his first true words in days. He cleared his throat and tried again, "Aslan?"

"What do you remember?"

Edmund blinked and closed his eyes, "I was…..having a really good dream. The best I've had in my life….but I don't remember it."

A rumble came from Aslan that sounded like a pleased laugh. "I know. But go further back."

Edmund stared at Aslan for a good minute before it came back and his hand flew to this abdomen with a gasp.

"Peace, dear child. You are well now."

"Arrow", Edmund murmured, "Cold. It happened so fast." He swallowed, shivering at the memory, "I remember feeling off, feeling cold and the next thing I knew there was an arrow sticking out of me. I think I remember Peter and after that….the dream I can't remember."

The Just King looked up at Aslan, "Where is everyone? What happened since I was gone? Is Peter alright? My sisters?"

"Calm down", Aslan's voice was soothing as he gave the soft order making Edmund's heart not speed up, "You're siblings are fine. Peter hardly left your side. He is with your sisters now."

Edmund gave a relieved sigh before murmuring, "Oh Peter, how much trouble did you make while I was gone?", as he knew that Peter probably did, before he stopped and pause before asking looking back at Aslan, "Wait! How long was I gone?"

"This is the fourth day."

"Four whole days!"

"More or less."

Edmund gaped at Aslan before looking away in shock.

"Now…..I'm sure you are anxious to see your siblings, so I suggest getting cleaned up. But before that…..you didn't tell them." Aslan voice went from amused to stern.

Edmund looked back at Aslan uncertain. "Tell….them…what?" he asked.

Golden-green eyes bore into dark ones making the owner of the latter swallow. "I don't know what you are referring to Aslan." And since nothing was really coming to him, he really knew not what Aslan was talking about it.

"Think about it."

Edmund shook his head, while he thought about it, trying to come up with something. It took a few moments, but something flashed in his mind, suddenly. He gave a small shiver, as he now knew what Aslan was talking about. A wave of guilt passed through him.

"Yes, Edmund, that. You didn't tell them. Why?"

Edmund found he couldn't look Aslan in the eyes as he fiddled with the bed covers. He couldn't answer.

"Edmund", but Aslan demanded an answer.

"I….I….I don't know. I just…..I didn't really think…..I mean….it's just…they had other things to worry about and I figure it didn't make any sense. That is to say…." Edmund trailed off not knowing how to answer.

Aslan looked at Edmund with a little sadness in his eyes, feeling the turmoil in the young boy, "They deserve to know, do you not think so?"

Edmund nodded, "I know." answering the question but not in full.

Aslan studied him a long moment longer before he stood up on all fours, "Go get cleaned up and then I shall take you to your siblings."

Edmund slowly threw back the covers and it took a moment for him to regain the use of his legs before he walked to the bathroom. He stopped and looked back at Aslan. He knew the answer but he couldn't help but ask, "If I had told them, would I not have been...killed?"

Edmund shut his eyes and cracked one open, looking sheepish, at the growl that came from Aslan, that was more exasperated than angry.

"You know the answer to that. You can never know the answer to that. That is not the path you took therefore that path has no merit. Go get cleaned up."

"Yes, sir."

Aslan walked to the door where Oreius was waiting patiently. He had sent the other guards away so there was no one in the hallway but him. "Get Edmund a change of clothes, please."

That order shocked Oreius and he wanted so much to say something but he simply bowed and went to complete his task. He was back in a few minutes walking in the room to lay the clothes on the empty bed.

Emphasis on empty.

Here he couldn't help but asked, "Aslan, is he really...?"

Said Lion looked amused as he was lying off to the side and out of the way. "You see the empty bed, do you not?"

Oreius looked happy yet shocked as he bowed and walked back out. Edmund came out a few moments later and changed into his clothes. When he was done, Aslan stood up and they quietly walked out into the hallway.

Edmund and Oreius locked eyes. Edmund mouth twitched in a smile.

Oreius finally managed to collect himself and bowed, "My king. It's good to see that you are back, by the grace and will of Aslan."

"Thank you, General Oreius."

Said general inclined his head still shocked. A part of him wondered if he was shocked, then what would the other monarchs react. He knew like himself, they would immensely happy.

* * *

><p>"Peter, please for the love of Aslan himself, sit down!" Susan cried.<p>

They were all in the sitting room that the Queens were in the other day. Shortly after the Queens returned to their rooms, Peter found them. He cleaned himself up and tried to make himself presentable with a change of new clothes. He had forgotten about shoes but no matter the plush carpets made one want to forgo shoes anyway. Susan had ran a comb in Peter's hair, the first in the last several days. Peter wasn't able to sit still as he tended to want to move around a lot.

Susan suggested they move to the sitting room for more comfort. Once there, she opened the window allowing the breeze to float in. Lucy sat in the window sill seat. Both Susan and Peter were sitting on the couch facing the window, back to the door. Peter however didn't last long as he began walking around the room. Susan got up and sat down next to Lucy and both began watching Peter's trek.

It must have been the fiftieth time around when Susan finally spoke up.

"I'm sorry, Susan, but I'm so nervous." Peter spoke.

"As are we all but you aren't helping!"

"Sorry", he murmured quietly before promptly sitting down which was in a seat off the side. His knee started bouncing up and down.

Susan gave a long-suffering sigh.

Lucy's voice was calm, "Alright, let's everyone calm down. This is Aslan. Whatever he's doing it for the good. So deep breathes…."

"I'd believe you were calm if not for your drumming fingers." Susan noted wryly.

"Least I'm not pacing", Lucy gestured to where Peter had started up again. She had stopped her drumming only to resume a few seconds later. Susan only sighed but didn't bother to say anything.

It wasn't until the door opened and Aslan stepped in first, did all movements stop. Peter had stopped a few steps beyond his sisters as watched the Lion walk in. Aslan stepped aside and sat down as a tentative head poked itself in. Oreius was standing out in the hallway as Edmund lumbered in and looked awkwardly.

Everyone stared in silence. Edmund managed to nod, "Hi."

"EDMUND!" both girls cried making Edmund cringe as he was sure that was heard clear across Narnia. He found himself almost on the ground when two pairs of arms where hugging him and two sets of babbles were working their way into his ears.

Edmund was not a huggy person by nature, but he figured he let it slide this time. That was until his neck and back started hurting.

"Unless you plan to break your brother in half, I suggest the two of your ease up a little", Aslan chuckled.

That made both sisters snatched their arms from around Edmund's neck allowing him to straighten up. "What have they've been feeding you two when I was gone?" he asked.

Tears were swimming in the two young girl's eyes.

"Oh Edmund, we missed you!" Lucy couldn't help but throw her arm around his middle.

"Yes, we missed you." Susan gave him a peak on the cheek making him winkle his nose but said nothing else, making the two of them giggle.

Edmund couldn't help the small smile as he looked up at Peter who was just staring at him. "Hey, Pete." he managed and uncertain smile.

Peter didn't say nothing, making Lucy and Susan worry. They've seen this before, in the beginning when Edmund had died; Peter checking out. Even Oreius was worried as he observed quietly. Aslan was the only one who looked on calmly.

Edmund gently pushed his sisters out the way as he walked around the couch. Peter's eyes followed his every move. "Hey, Peter, you in there?" he asked.

When he received no answer, he tried for a joke, "Don't me break and enter."

He frowned and placed his hands on his brother's shoulders and shook him once when he Peter just continued to stare at him, his eyes boring into him, "Pete!"

And then he found himself being crushed tightly, more so than his two sisters combined.

"Ed", he heard the soft broken whisper.

"Hey, Pete." He murmured.

"Hey, Ed. Hey." Edmund heard Peter sniff.

They stayed like that for awhile, the girls watching with silent tears.

"Hey, um…..all this crushing and bending and carrying on is really not good on the back so if you could….."

Pete snatched away if burned, "Sorry…" he mumbled, not quite able to stop touching his brother's arm or something, as if assuring that he's still here.

Aslan nodded and stood up. "Let us go, young ones. Your brothers need a few minutes to themselves. You will see them both a little later." He walked out followed hesitantly by the two Queens and Oreius. The door shut behind them, leaving the two brothers alone to talk.

Peter was the first to break the silence that floated between them, "You here?" His question was underlined in a series of pokes.

"Yes, are you?" Edmund asked.

Peter smiled lightly as Edmund sat down on the couch looking out the window. Peter just stood and stared at him. Edmund finally looked up at Peter, "You gonna be okay?"

"Are you?"

"I'm breathing, so yes."

"Breathing is good. That's always good." Peter muttered.

Edmund grabbed his brother's wrist and made him sit down. He went to release him only to have Peter catch ahold of his wrist. Edmund smiled lightly at this. "So….what happened when I was gone?"

"Nothing…." Muttered Peter who was looking at the ground.

"Did they get the ones who…..killed me?"

Edmund watch Peter's eyes flashed at this. "Yes, they did." His voice was tight.

"Peter….?"

"What?"

"What aren't you telling me?"

Peter shrugged. Edmund narrowed his eyes and looked Peter appraisingly up and down. "What did you do?"

"I didn't do anything."

There was a warning note in the younger brother's voice as he drawled, "Peter…."

"Nothing!" Peter snapped his eyes wide as he looked up at Edmund, "I didn't do anything, cause between our sisters and Oreius, they wouldn't let me do anything."

"Anything like?"

Peter looked shamed which was a good thing considering, but Edmund would fish until he got what he want, "Peter?"

"."

"Wha?"

Peter had spoken fast and under his breath so Edmund didn't catch it that time. "I wanted to kill them."

Edmund stared blankly at his brother, "Kill them? As in…."

"March down to the dungeons and just hack them to pieces and be done with it?" It came out in question format. Peter wince even as it came out of his mouth.

The Just King's mouth fell open at such a heavy admission, "Without a trial, without them presenting their case?"

Peter shot out of his seat, "That's the point!"

"What is?"

"They don't have a case! What's with everyone thinking they have case! They tried to kill you! They did kill you and you and everyone else says they have a case?"

"Peter!" Edmund was stunned at such emotion coming out of his older brother, "I'm glad that you were stopped then. I would never have wanted such a merciless thing."

"I know. I know…I just….." Peter sighed and flopped back down, "It's just….you were dead. You know? You were dead and….and…so…so…..merciless, you know? You didn't have a chance to defend yourself and I just….." he shrugged, "Oreius is right though. I would have regretted it if I did such a thing. I regret even having such emotions to begin with you but you have to understand, you were dead and it wasn't a rightful death. Nothing about it was rightful." Peter looked up imploring at his younger brother, willing him to understand.

"I know, but I'm here now, by the grace of Aslan."

Peter pulled Edmund to him, "I know and I'm so thankful. I don't know what I would have done. I kept praying and pleading…" His voice choked up again.

"It'll be okay." murmured Edmund.

"Thank Aslan for that." Peter murmured.

_Thank you, Aslan. Thank you. _Peter thought over and over.

_You are welcome, my son. _

**TBC….**

* * *

><p>A.N: Yay! Edmund's back! *throws confetti* Like I said, I always clean up my messes. Come on, was anyone really truly worried? Anyone seriously think I would kill off Edmund for good? No way! Can't have that. I don't even do death-fics, can't stand them.<p>

But rest assured, this is far from over. Far, far, far from over. Edmund is back, but that doesn't make him free of my torture for the coming chapters. I love the guy.

But what is Edmund hiding?

Hmmm…


	7. CH 6: Five hours later

Disclaimer:  As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship.

A.N: Yeah, about the Edmund torture, not yet, lol. He's gotta have a moment to breath no matter how much he protest otherwise...That and the others deserve a moment to breath as well, lol. =D

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

* * *

><p>Chapter 6: Five hours later<p>

"You want to what?" Peter voice went a few octaves higher.

Edmund wince. "Well, I can't very well hide out and I'm sure the news is spreading."

"You just were resurrected almost five hours ago and you want to make a presentation now?"

"They day is still young. It's only the afternoon."

"But, but, but, you just got woke up!" Peter sputtered.

Edmund sighed as Susan and Lucy watched. Oreius was awaiting a final word and Aslan was silent throughout the whole thing.

"I know I just woke up, but we may as well, get it out the way."

Peter turned to his sisters, "Talk to him, will you?"

Susan touched Edmund's arm, "Are you sure you shouldn't be taking it easy?"

"I've been taking it easy the past couple of days. If I see a bed right now I'll throw something."

"That's not funny" Peter stated flatly.

Edmund's voice was just as flat, "Don't remember trying to be."

"Lucy?" the High King asked.

"Well…..if Edmund feels well enough….." the youngest sibling started.

"Oh, what the? Oreius, surely this is a bit much for Edmund right now." Peter turned to the general hoping to get him on his side.

Oreius looked at the four of them. "I think you should take it easy right now, King Edmund."

"Thank you! Someone with some sense!" Peter cried.

"But…."

"There's a but….?"

Oreius mouth twitched, "But if you truly feel this is something you must do, I won't stop you. It is a noble sentiment."

"I take back what I said about the sense" Peter muttered to himself, making a small smile come to the general's face.

"Aslan?" Lucy asked.

"This is a matter to resolve between all of you."

Edmund jumped on that, "See that was practically a go-ahead, right there."

Peter held the bridge of his nose. "Alright, since I'm clearly outnumbered." Here he paused to glare at Oreius, "Then fine." Here he pinned a steely glaze to Edmund, "But if you breathe wrong, if you make a wrong step, it's finished, it's over, it's done and I'll have you hogtied to the bed if I have to."

Edmund winced and silently glance at Aslan in askance of strength. He knew that his older brother was not lying and he was in overprotective hen mood.

Dangerous mood that was.

And rightful so at this point in time.

Edmund nodded. "Deal."

Peter sighed, "Set it up for us then, please, General Oreius."

Said general sketched a bow, "With pleasure, majesties."

"You give me a headache", Peter groused reaching out and wrapping an arm around Edmund's neck.

Edmund managed a lopsided grin, "You probably already have a longstanding one."

"Yeah….I do." Peter murmured absently.

"Let's go get ready, huh?" Susan said quickly hoping not to let Peter go down that road.

"Mr. Tumnus is here. He'll assist you into your garb, okay?" asked Lucy.

Edmund was already told that his valet was in on his assassination. When they told him, they were worried when Edmund got a faraway look but snapped out of it quickly. But strangely Edmund didn't seem as upset as they would have expected by the news.

Edmund nodded, "Okay."

"Are you gonna be at the presentation, Aslan?" Susan asked.

"Yes, dear children, I will."

Lucy pulled Susan out and Edmund followed behind with his second shadow that was currently clinging to him. "Peter, you are gonna have to let me go so I can get ready."

"It's not gonna be until another two or so hours so we've got time", Peter murmured.

"I guess so. We don't take all day like the girls" Edmund conceded.

"Good."

There was silence as they went into Edmund's room. The first time either had stepped foot in the room since that day. Peter look stricken as Edmund wondered around is room pulling some things, "Are you sure you have to do this?"

"Peter, what am I suppose to do? Hide from them?"

"No, of course not. But there is still tomorrow."

"Why put off tomorrow what you can accomplish today."

"I'm getting real tired of having clichés quoted in my face. It's not helping."

Edmund shrugged, "But it's true, besides, I'm not giving them or anyone else the satisfaction." He slammed a draw closed.

"Edmund?" Peter asked.

As Edmund's back was to Peter, he didn't see the tightness in Edmund's face. He felt ill when he thought of what happened to him. And then wondering if he could have prevented it. Not because of his selfish reasons of not wanting to die but to have spared his sibling the pain of going through what they went through.

"Edmund?" Peter asked again, walking over and touching his younger brother's shoulder.

"Nothing, sorry." Edmund shook off Peter's hand and proceed to walk to the bathroom.

"Edmund!"

"What!" said male whirled around.

"Ed, what's going through your head? I told you, you need to take it easy."

"I'm fine! I'm perfectly fine!"

"Are you? Are you really? Why is it so important that you can't wait until the morning?"

Edmund leaned on the wall his head down-cast. Peter paused before speaking, "Please, I want an answer. I'm just trying to look out for you, like I should have been."

"What are you talking about?"

"I should have done something instead I just watched you….."

"Peter…" Edmund started warningly lifting his head up to glare at Peter who was looking stricken, "Don't go there, Pete. There is nothing you could have done. Absolutely nothing. I mean we never really thought about something as crude as assassination. I'm just glad that the three of you are fine." Then he murmured under his breath, "I'm not surprise that you aren't."

Peter heard him and his eyes narrowed, "What are you talking about?"

"Hm?"

"Why aren't you surprised that none of the rest of us weren't targeted? You know something, don't you? Talk to me."

Edmund glared at Peter as he pushed himself off the wall. "Calm down." He went to close the door, but Peter crossed the distance quickly and held it open.

"I'm cancelling this until tomorrow. And then you and I are gonna talk!"

"Wait a second!"

"Wait nothing! I knew this was some kind of proving thing you are doing. And there are things you aren't telling me and there is no reason we can't have this tomorrow around noon or one, then we have all day for it. It's almost evening now."

"What do you know?" Edmund shot back.

"I'd know more, if you talk to me."

"There is nothing to talk about!" as soon as it was out of his mouth Edmund knew it was a lie he didn't mean to utter.

Peter knew it too, by the way Edmund's eyes slid away from his, "Like I said, I'm pushing to tomorrow around noon or one. Deal with it." With that he shut the door and went to make the arrangements.

Edmund threw what was in his hands on the floor and plopped down on a small couch, holding his head in his hands. He didn't know how long he sat like that, staring at that white tile on the floor, before he heard a knock and the door ease open.

"Edmund?"

Said young male didn't say anything.

"Edmund please. I've almost lost you once, I lost you this time. Don't give me grief about this. Please talk to me." Peter murmured sinking next to his younger brother.

"I can't….not now. I just…..can't." came a young boy's voice.

"But there is something?"

Silence was enough of an answer.

"Why don't I order dinner? I bet you forgot about it. I forgot about it."

"You probably didn't eat that much did you?" Edmund muttered glancing at Peter.

Peter looked abashed. "Not really. Except Lu and Su managed to stuff something down my throat after awhile."

"Thank Aslan for that."

Peter stood up. "Come on, we'll have a family meal. I'm sure we are all over due."

Dinner was a quiet affair with the siblings. Aslan did not attend knowing that the siblings need some time alone. Lucy and Susan enjoyed stuffing their brothers full of food. They eyed every piece of food that went into Edmund's and Peter's mouths that it was a wonder they managed to clean their own plate. And even when Peter and Edmund announced they were full, still the girls were insistence on just a little more. Just a little more worked its way to another helping but after that the boys put their foot down.

Then the siblings had a little stroll throughout the garden. Edmund was greeted warmly by the Narnians he came across, the few that they came across. And when they got to the gardens the dryads all greeted Edmund and sung Aslan's praises that he was back.

They were all lounging around until they heard some galloping and a sudden stop, making them all look up.

Phillip stood staring at the Kings and Queens but mostly one king in particular.

Edmund smiled once as he stood walking over, inclining his head. "Lo, Phillip."

The Horse just stared at Edmund who frowned and stepped closer reaching out and touching his nose. "Phillip?"

Said Horse managed to snap out of it, his voice wavering just barely, "I-I-I heard the rumor, that you were...that you were back. I needed to see for myself."

"I'm back", Edmund reassured.

Phillip snorted, "Thank Aslan, for that."

Edmund nodded.

"...I'm sorry."

Edmund frowned, "What are you apologizing for?"

Phillip looked guilty, lowering his head, bumping it lightly against Edmund in affection, "I just stood there and..."

"Now, just a minute." Edmund interrupted fiercely making the Horse look at him, "Do not develop a Peter complex on me!"

"Hey, I resent that!" piped said male.

Edmund threw a withering glare over his shoulder at his older brother before glaring back at the Horse, "I don't blame either of you and both of you need to get that through your thick heads and fast."

Both Phillip and Peter exchanged a look. Phillip snorted again and leaned his head against Edmund. Only as a friend could do, Edmund patted and soothed Phillip. "I'm okay, really. I am."

Phillip nodded and murmured. "I am glad. I will bless the name of Aslan a thousand times for this. And then thousand and one more to add. And even if I added many more thousands of thousands it still wouldn't be enough."

Edmund chuckled lightly at this before suggesting, "Come, why don't you join us?"

"Yes, join us!" Lucy encouraged.

Phillip nodded and trotted over. He sat down and Edmund sat down and leaned against him. It was a comfort for both. The royal family and Phillip talked about nothing as time passed.

It wasn't until somehow Edmund's head found it's way onto Lucy's lap and his eyes were fluttering, the day catching up to him, that Peter declared they should turn in for the night, in anticipating of the next day. Phillip bid the family good-night before returning to his stable feeling better than he did when he came. The Kings and Queens walked back into the palace and parted ways with a good night.

"You don't have to stay with me, Peter" Edmund tried to dismiss before Peter ran to his room to get a change of clothes and such and returned.

There a simple reply that ended that conversation, "Don't remember asking you." As Peter exited the room.

Edmund gave a small chuckle as he went into the bathroom.

Truth be told, neither one wanted to be separate for long and somewhere in the night two more joined and by the day, four siblings were resting comfortably all snuggled up.

**TBC….**

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><p>A.N: Not that much happening in this chapter. I promise you it will pick up again, but this was more a feel-good chap I suppose.<p>

Originally I forgot about Phillip. Yeah, I know, a shame, but when I was re-editing this, I had to get some Phillip in this. I had eventually forgot he was there when the assassination happened and would have felt really bad like Peter and needed some reassurance. **  
><strong>


	8. CH 7: Day Five: Justice is Reserved

Disclaimer:  As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship.

A.N: We start picking up again now that Edmund is back and Peter made him take a breather for half a second.

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

* * *

><p>Chapter 7: Day Five- Justice is Reserved<p>

"You gonna be alright?" Peter asked for probably the tenth time as they waited to be announced.

All of Narnians, as many could come on short notice were invited to Cair Paravel for a special announcement. It actually worked better that they held it the next day since more were able to arrive. Peter had been eyeing Edmund all morning. Since there were so many and because it was a nice day, the dais in the garden was used this time.

Edmund sighed, "Yes, I'm okay.

They decided they were gonna alter the order of the Kings and Queens in the way they were normally called. Partly for safety and mostly because Peter didn't want to let Edmund walk alone right. No one fussed with it since they all had it in their minds. Aslan was also there.

"You ready?" Peter asked.

"Yeah, I'm ready as I'll ever be."

Peter eyed his brother a little longer before looking at the girls who nodded then he signaled the herald, Sir Giles Fox who rapped the podium to get attention. When it was quiet he intoned, "Presenting their majesties the Queens, Queen Susan the Gentle and Queen Lucy the Valiant!"

Both Queens walked to their throne and stood facing the crowd.

"Presenting, their majesties, High King Peter the Magnificent and King Edmund the Just!"

There were shocked murmurs that quickly turned into pleased murmurs when they saw that King Edmund was indeed alive. The two kings walked to their thrones and turned around. Then in sync the siblings all went down on one knee as Sir Giles Fox announced, "Presenting, his majesty, High King over all kings in Narnia, the Great Lion, Aslan!"

Everyone paid homage as they were able as the Great Cat walked down the aisle. When he got to the dais he gracefully stepped up and turned around. The Kings and Queens then stood and backed up taking their respective thrones.

The murmurs started up again, most of the Narnians glancing at King Edmund who was poise perfectly, his face expressionless. High King Peter kept looking at his younger brother out the corner of his eye, keeping a close eye. He even glanced around at the Narnian's noting expressions and body language. He never really realized truly but some seemed a little uncomfortable when they looked at Edmund, but many seemed genuinely pleased that he was back. Peter didn't really know what to make of this.

"My dear Narnians", came Aslan loud and clear voice settling the murmurs that started up again, "I know it has been the most trying time this past week. Such an event stirring the hearts and minds of Narnians across the land. An event that has never been heard of in Narnia before."

Here Aslan paused and allowed his powerful gaze to sweep across the land.

"Everything happens for a reason rather we know why or not." Here Aslan's gaze swept towards the Kings and lingered on Edmund in particular. It made Peter glance at Edmund who still looked expressionless, except for when Aslan's glaze pierced his, his eyes flickered once.

Peter knew that there had to be something that Edmund wasn't telling. In fact since he awoke, Edmund hadn't really expressed a reaction to what happened to him. If it was anything it was quiet acceptance and that bothered Peter on many levels.

And on some levels he didn't even know why.

Aslan turned back to the crowd, "Such an injustice was done, this I agree. And I'm saddened that it came from our beloved land. That there were Narnians that took a wrong turn. I know many of your railed for punishment from me immediately, but my time is not your time." Here he paused and turned around facing the Kings and Queens, "But this is a matter to resolve between you and your sovereigns."

The Kings and Queens couldn't help but stare at Aslan in shock. They would have to take care of it? How could they ever do such a thing? Peter in particular felt sickened by the thought for two reasons. One, for Edmund's sake and two, he did not want to lose himself like he did the other day. He still harbored guilt for such destructing thoughts, that he didn't even know he was capable of feeling.

And that was all, not having laid eyes on the assassinatiors, he didn't want to think of actually facing them.

_Oh, Aslan, please help me. Help us. _Peter prayed.

_Peace my son. You all will do well. _

Peter tried not to question that sentiment but it was hard. Aslan's gaze lingered on each monarch ending with Edmund, looking at him longer that the other three. Now Susan and Lucy looked worriedly at Edmund as did Peter. Edmund swallowed.

Aslan gave a Lion's smile, "Justice in Narnia is reserved to the Just King with help of course." He glanced at the other three. Then he turned around and faced the crowd, "I know that your Kings and Queens will bring the proper justice to the assassinators."

And here a roar of approval went up from the large crowd that gathered.

* * *

><p>"You cannot be serious!" Susan cried pleadingly, "Facing those murders?"<p>

"Please, Aslan hasn't Edmund been through enough? Haven't we been through enough?" tears glittered in Lucy's eyes.

"Please, why can't you take care of it? Wouldn't it be easier?" Peter asked.

It was many hours after the assembly. After Aslan's speech and the crowd was eager to welcome back the Just King to his rightful position. Many came and greeted the Just King joyously. Needless to say the High King never strayed two inches from his younger brother king. There was a jolly celebration that lasted all afternoon. Although the Kings and Queens enjoyed it, they were worried about what Aslan had said. They didn't begrudged their fellow Narnians their happiness so they went with the flow.

Until about the evening when Edmund was starting to get tired and a little overwhelmed by all this. Peter pounced on that and announced that he and his brother and sisters were retiring. There was a loud cheerful goodbye as they left, for the most part. Peter had observed closely, and he noticed a few Narnians that seemed not to come anywhere near Edmund. These were the ones in the crowd that seemed uncomfortable. It disturbed Peter and he didn't know what to make of it.

Now once they were out of their official garb, they all met in the sitting room and proceeded to discuss this responsibility they were given. Ironically, Aslan had shown up a few minutes later and the Kings and Queens were all busy trying to convince Aslan otherwise. He had said anything and neither did Edmund.

"All of you will do well, with this", Aslan spoke finally.

"But…we are too close to the situation." Susan spoke up logically.

"Precisely."

"…" No one was expecting that response.

Aslan looked at Edmund who was looking down at his lap. That made everyone between Edmund and Aslan.

"I think that Aslan is right." Came the soft reply a few minutes later. Edmund lifted his head and looked at his siblings, "This is something I need to do anyway."

A pin drop could be heard.

"What are you talking about? Why?" demanded Peter.

Edmund took a deep breath and looked at his older brother, "It just is."

"There is still something you aren't telling me. Telling us."

Edmund shifted but didn't say anything. "It's still something I have to do. I want to set a date to hear them."

"Won't be any time in the next couple of days. You are taking it easy." Peter's voice booked no argument.

Edmund glared at his brother. "The sooner I get though this, the sooner I can get this out of my head."

"Admirable, I'm sure, but since you've come back…" Here Peter's voice wavered as the memories assaulted him, "….you've barely sat still. A few days would do you some good."

Edmund gave a wry grin, "I've sat still for three days."

Peter looked like he's been punched and the girls looked queasy.

"Explain to me, how you can crack jokes about it?" Susan ventured painfully since no one was saying anything.

"Sorry", came the mumbled reply.

"You still haven't answered my question."

Edmund said nothing making Susan sigh. Peter was still looking sick.

"Shouldn't Edmund be resting?" Lucy inquired of Aslan.

Aslan didn't say anything at first. "Edmund should do what he feels he needs to do."

The three siblings deflated at that. Silence drifted for a long while after that.

"Good, now how soon can we get this scheduled?" Edmund said finally.

"Will you be there, Aslan?" Lucy asked.

Aslan shook his head. "I'm afraid, my dear children, that this is the last day I will be here. Tomorrow I will be gone."

"Oh, Aslan!" Lucy flung herself into Aslan's mane, "Can you not stay for a little while longer? See us through this trial?"

"I will always be watching over you, dear one. All of you. Just remember that you have each other. All of you will get through this."

His gaze rested on each young child in turn.

**TBC….**


	9. CH 8: Day of Reckoning

Disclaimer:  As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship. Unfortunately, I do own the assassinator group including Geramius. Yay.

A.N:  This would probably be the longest chapter of this story. Maybe...depends on how the re-editing goes. Enjoy.

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

* * *

><p>Chapter 8: Day of Reckoning<p>

It was a flurry of activity with getting the trial scheduled and of course the first year reign of the Kings and Queens were fast approaching. They were asked if they wanted to reschedule it but Edmund was adamant about not changing it. He would not give his murders the satisfaction and after much convincing, Susan and Peter were in agreement. Lucy would go with the popular vote. As he said, Aslan was gone the next day, much to the sadness of the monarchs and even the Narnians. The trial was set two days later.

The Kings and Queens were nervous about this, but none so much as Edmund but he wasn't outwardly nervous like the girls or even like Peter. It's just that the Just King could not focus on too much of anything. He still couldn't really sleep. Peter still hadn't returned to his own rooms, yet, and neither really wanted the other to go. Peter dozed here and there which was more than Edmund, who was normally up before Peter was.

But finally after two slow crawling days, the day of reckoning had arrived.

"Are you nervous, King Edmund?" Tumnus the fawn asked. They still hadn't found a new valet for Edmund and frankly Peter wasn't really comfortable with the idea of finding one at the moment so Tumnus filled in still when needed.

Though just because of the situation, Peter wasn't 100% comfortable with Edmund being alone with anyone, even Mr. Tumnus. If Peter could, he would be helping Edmund get dressed and saving himself the headache, but unfortunately that wouldn't work because Peter needed to get dressed himself.

Now, Tumnus and Edmund were not friends by any means, especially not like the fawn was with Lucy, but they were still very civil with each other.

"Why do you ask?" Edmund asked.

"You are shaking, majesty."

"I am?"

Tumnus chuckled. "Yes."

"Sorry."

"No need to apologize. You have a right to be nervous."

"I hope it doesn't show." Edmund groaned muttering under his breath.

"Not really. I just feel it."

There was a moment of silence between them.

"Tumnus?"

"Yes, my king?"

"I know we aren't friends, but I just wanted to know…." Edmund trailed off, "Do you…have you….."

Tumnus held his shock well at his. He rarely heard Edmund not be able to articulate well. He was silent slowing his work allowing, the young man to get his thoughts together.

Edmund shook his head. "Never mind."

"My King…." Tumnus started pausing in his ministrations, "If there is anything I can do to ease this tension you have, I will. Please, whatever the question, if I can answer I will." He caught Edmund's glaze in the mirror they were standing in front of.

"Honestly?"

"I would not lie to you, majesty. I have put those days behind me." Tumnus resumed his work.

"Do you hate me?"

Tumnus stilled his head going up in shock. "Never."

Edmund raised an eyebrow with an amused smile, though there was uncertainty in his eyes as he looked at Tumnus in the mirror, "You, more than many, have a personal reason enough to hate me."

They both thought of their time in the Witch's dungeons. It was not a memory neither liked to visit. And uncomfortable air passed between them.

Edmund fixed his gaze to look at his clothes. "Hate me enough to want me dead."

"I was not involved in such a conspiracy!" Tumnus cried defensively.

"I'm not saying you were. I know you weren't." stated Edmund, "I'm just saying, that I know many Narnian's hated me and some probably still do and with good reason. I'm just asking if you ever, even the smallest part of you, wanted me dead for my crimes against Narnia? That is all I'm asking. No more, no less."

"No."

There was such conviction in Tumnus' voice that it made Edmund lift his head up to look at the fawn in the mirror. He was startled and borderline shocked at the most serious and grave expression that the young man ever saw on the fawn's face. Edmund didn't even know what to say.

He didn't need to speak as Tumnus continued, "I have never, ever, even once wanted you dead after the you were crowned King. I never even wished you dead when I was dragged to the courtyard and turned stone. Never. I don't hate you. I admit I was disappointed and upset, but I never gave into any such disturbing emotion such as hate. I certainly never hated you that much. The only one I ever hated that much and more was the White Witch. Granted I was dubious when you were crown King, but I trusted Aslan's judgment and I gave you a chance. And rest assured, I was not disappointed."

Here a small smile broke through, "You are a Just King in all ways. You have faced many of the Witches' servants, heard them and sentenced them fairly. You have worked yourself to the point of exhaustion all to prove yourself and that is all in just this one year alone. You have my loyalty, what's more, you earned it. That's why I know you will do well today."

Edmund had to look away, his eyes lowering. Tumnus busied himself with getting Edmund's cape and fastening it, allowing the younger monarch to think on his words.

When that was done, Tumnus checked the Just King's crown before turning around with it in his hands.

"Thank you." Edmund had turned around and offered him a small smile.

Tumnus gave a small bow, "No thanks is necessary."

A knock on the door resounded followed by it opening. "You ready, Edmund?" Peter asked stepping in already dressed in his official royal garb.

Tumnus and Edmund looked at him when he entered before looking at each other.

Peter looked between them and then asked warily and slowly, "Is...everything...okay?"

The duo looked at each other a little longer before Edmund looked back at his older brother. "Yes, brother, everything is fine."

Tumnus came over and situated the crown on Edmund's head. He surveyed his young monarch before stating, "Perfect, majesty."

"Thank you."

Tumnus' response was a bow before Edmund inclined his head before walking out the door, looking more relaxed than he did in days. Peter was confused as his brother passed him. He looked at Tumnus than his retreating brother, then back to Tumnus. Then he offered a grateful smile at Lucy's friend. He didn't know what happened, but it seemed it was something good, and he was grateful.

* * *

><p>"You sure you gonna be okay?" Peter asked as they were waiting to go into the throne room.<p>

"Peter, I swear. You ask me that again, and you won't step foot into this room." Edmund snapped.

Susan nudged Peter who looked at her. She mouthed, 'That's a no.'

Peter gave a look that said, 'Ya think?'

"Let us calm down, okay? We'll get through this", Lucy spoke up the voice of calmness, "If Aslan put this task to us that means we can do it. Just remember to do Aslan's will as best we can throughout this."

Her siblings all nodded.

"Okay, deep breathes, everyone."

Everyone, including Lucy herself, took a deep breath and let it out.

"Good. Now, let's do this. In Aslan's name."

"In Aslan's name", the other three monarch's echoed.

And instantly there was a sense of peace that stole throughout them, although their nerves were still a bit rocky.

"Peter….." Edmund spoke.

"Yes, Edmund?"

"I need you to stand down on this. I want to lead this."

Peter twitched. There went the peace for Peter but Edmund faced his brother square on. "Peter, I need to do this. I need to hear what they say, whatever they say. I need your word you will let them speak, no matter what atrocities they may utter."

Peter's mouth tightened in a thin line as he turned around so his siblings wouldn't see the murderous rage that was working its way to his face. He prayed to Aslan for strength behind this.

Edmund took a step forward, "I know you want to protect me. But I need you to put aside the big brother Peter and bring out High King Peter in all ways."

"Big brother and High King Peter may be a little intertwined right now." Came the forced response.

"Peter, please. I need to do this. This is something that I need to do." Edmund pressed, "I can't move on from this until I do this. I need to know you'll follow my lead on this. And when you have questions…" here he paused and looked a little absent.

It made Peter turn around slightly in time to see this and their sisters were watching worriedly.

Edmund shook himself, "When you have questions, save them for later. I need your word."

Peter turned fully to face Edmund. They looked at each other, both serious. The girls were looking between the two. They were silent throughout all this, allowing their brothers to resolve this.

"It's like you know that something is going to happen. In fact, there still things you aren't telling us, aren't telling me. Haven't even begun to try to tell me", it was a statement not a question from the High King.

Edmund's eyes never wavered from this brother's but he did avoid responding directly to the statement, "Please, my King."

Peter stared at Edmund another long while. Susan and Lucy were holding their breath. Finally Peter nodded and looked regally at Edmund, "Very well…my King. I give you my word, but you will have to understand something..."

Edmund waited.

"If I feel that it goes too far, I will intervene. I will only allow blatant disrespect to go so far."

Edmund's held his brother's eyes a long moment before slowly nodding. "Agreed."

"We ready?" Susan asked after another lingering silence had passed.

"Yes, I think we are", Peter stated slowly a questioning note lingering in his voice.

Edmund nodded. "Yes, we are."

Many Narnians were packed in the room, wanting to watch the trial. They too wanted to hear what the assassinators had to say. Such an event had never happened and many wanted to know where it went wrong. The general Oreius was off the side and many of the soldiers were line around the room. Oreius was taking no changes.

High King Peter nodded to Sir Giles Fox to start.

"Bring in the prisoners." The fox spoke gravely.

The doormen pushed the door open and soldiers escorted the small group in. There was a Minotaur who glared at everyone and looked as if he didn't care. There was a squirrel, whose twitching tail betrayed its nervousness, but since squirrel's tails were always twitching it was hard to tell. There was also a dryad and two cats. There was also an old hag that swayed as she walked. Like the Minotaur she looked unperturbed at what was happening. And last but not least there was the valet that served Edmund named Geramius, who looked like he was about three steps away from fainting, but still managed to lift his chin up at those around him.

Loud murmurs went up from the crowd when they saw this surprising group. The surprise quickly turned into angry murmurs and from there it turned into jeers in a matter of moments.

"Peace, my dear Narnians", the High King surprised himself by saying firmly, making the crowd settle down, though many had disapproval written all over their faces when they glared at the group. Peter glared at the group, and constantly had to pray to Aslan to not lose himself. He no longer felt that murderous rage he felt a few days ago. He glanced at his fellow king, allowing that to further cool his temper.

King Edmund sat erect and regal, surveying the group with quiet dignity. The Queens also looked regal though there was disappointment at the Narnians that were in the group.

Sir Giles Fox's tail twitched once, betraying his thoughts at seeing the atrocious group. "Do you know the charges you are faced with?" he spoke in a loud clear voice.

"And what is that?" the Minotaur spoke amused.

That made everyone in the room twitch.

Sir Giles cleared his throat and glanced down at the scroll, "You personally are charged with the attempt assassination of the Just King of Narnia."

"Last I checked he died." the Minotaur chuckled and looked pointly at said Just King.

"And last I checked by the grace of Aslan himself, the Just King, lives", Queen Lucy the Valiant spoke up.

"Hm, so he does." There was obvious disappointment in the Minotaur's voice.

"The rest of you are charged with conspiracy to assassination." Sir Giles surveyed to the rest of the group.

"We are giving you the chance to plead your case", Queen Susan spoke though it took everything in her to get those words out.

"Plead our case?" the hag laughed.

"We are all interested in why this happened. Perhaps you and your Minotaur friend, we are not that shocked about, but the rest of you….." sadness colored the Queen's voice as her gentle glaze swept over the others.

"Why?" Lucy asked equally sadden at this.

The Minotaur looked at Edmund and gave a mock bow towards him. "By the grace of Aslan...", here the Lion's name was said mockingly.

Peter had to hold himself. His mouth was pressed tightly together as he looked at Edmund out the corner of his eye. He would adhere to his brother's wishes, but he hadn't said anything yet.

"…Is the only reason you are here right now. You died, I know, because the squirrel saw and reported back to us, once I left after I let go of the arrow."

"Why? What was the reason for this elaborate plot? How did you do this?" Edmund spoke up then, asking softly as his eyes came to rest on Geramius.

The fawn trembled once but he held his head high and glared at the Just King. "We do not believe that you deserved to be King."

"And why not?" Edmund asked his voice devoid of any affliction.

"You? The one who betrayed your siblings and the country you now rule over to the White Witch. You were just as much as a servant of her as anyone else on her side was. Just because you backed out on a late date doesn't excuse what you've done."

"You're right."

"It's nice that you agree."

"But you are also wrong."

"Come again?"

"I have repented. I am sorry, truly sorry for all that I've done, and I've done nothing but try to make up for the wrong I've done but I know I can never truly do so."

The other monarchs wanted to console their brother but they said nothing.

The Minotaur snorted, "Please, save it for someone who cares. Is this so-called justice? Huh? How is it a betrayer is now sitting on one of the four thrones? Please, explain that to me."

"Aslan's knows what he is doing." Queen Lucy cut in smoothly, "He saw the heart of our royal brother. He knew that Edmund would be a great king because of what he had been through. King Edmund had to grow and learn and he did learn. Much."

The crowd gave loud murmurs of approval at the statement.

"Oh, please, spare me", one of the cats murmured.

"Do you have something to say? Please, speak", the Gentle Queen gave firm encouragement.

"I did not sign up for this. I have no problems with you or your royal sister. I even bless the name of the High King of Narnia", here the cat gave a bow to said King.

Peter twitched but he kept silent. He knew if he spoke, it wouldn't go well.

"But, your royal brother...", it was said with venom, "...I do not bless. In fact I curse him. I curse him to the high heavens."

The High King visible twitched and shifted on his throne, his fingers tightened on his armrests. Edmund glanced at his brother was a little surprised that Peter was trying hard to let Edmund lead this as he promised. Edmund knew that if Peter gave his word, he wouldn't go back on it, but it still was surprising. He loved his brother all the more in this instance for trusting Edmund enough to let this continue. There were a loud hiss from the crowd.

Edmund held up his hand, making the crowd quiet down to a point. Then he asked, "What have I done to earn your curse, cousin."

"Do not call me that!" the cat snapped, "I am not your cousin, nor will I ever be."

Susan's usually gentle voice was ice, "You pay us grave insult by insulting our royal brother thusly."

"I am not the only one to feel that way."

"We are not the only ones to feel that way", Geramius spoke up.

"We are just the only ones that had the guts to do what needed to be done", the second cat added.

Peter twitched as if he was going to say something but didn't.

"What do you mean by that?" asked Edmund.

"Surely you are not that stupid." The Minotaur's voice was flat.

Oreius couldn't help the stamp of his hoof. Edmund looked at him, but Oreius didn't do or say anything else. He wasn't the only one to make known he found that insulting as the crowd murmured angrily. Peter twitched again, his frown deepening, while Lucy and Susan were glaring at the Minotaur.

"Enlighten me", requested the Just king after a moment had passed.

The old hag laughed as the Minotaur continued, "You cannot be so naïve enough to not know that many Narnians didn't like you. They loved your royal siblings fine, I personally care not one way or the other for them, but you, they were wary of."

The royal siblings donned surprised looks as they all looked at Edmund for confirmation. Edmund face didn't change.

"Ahhh…." The Minotaur grinned mockingly, "I see even your royal siblings didn't even notice. How does it feel? Hm? I wonder. Suffering silently in the shadows while your siblings were in the light. Loved and adored by all, while when they were with you, they were stiff and wary. If they were in the presence of your royal siblings they hid it well, or perhaps said royal siblings ignored your pain to bask in their own glory they were receiving. How does that feel, hm?"

Said royal siblings noticed that many in the crowd began to shift uncomfortably. This shocked them but they didn't show it to any great degree. They continually glanced at Edmund to noticed his face was a complete mask. They had seen it before. The wall that Edmund built so that none but him knew what laid behind it. It disturbed the other siblings, especially Peter, but still he managed to keep his mouth pressed firmly together, almost to the point of pain.

"You tried your hardest to make up for your wrong doings but many didn't trust you explicitly and adore you like they did Queen Lucy. They didn't gravitate to you like bees to honey like they did Queen Susan. They didn't have that depth of respect as they did of High King Peter. They feared you instead. They were wary of you. Come on…." Here the Minotaur's voice rose as he looked around the room at the crowd, "Many of you know this to be true."

The crowd went real silent at this.

"How can any of you stay there and glare and jeer at us for things that you yourselves have felt? Don't be shy, step up and speak your mind freely! Don't hate us for doing something that none of you had the courage to do!"

Many in the crowd you could see physically shrunk at this. Even Oreius seemed surprised at some of the reactions of some of the Narnians in the crowd. Then it quickly became anger but he held his ground. He glared at the Minotaur and continually glanced at his younger king who still had not said anything or visible felt anything.

"Granted, as time passed, I will give some the fact that they came to realized that you were trying and slowly you had earned the respect that was freely given to your siblings", Geramius added.

Not one flicker of emotion betrayed King Edmund's thoughts.

"Must be hard. Be so alone amidst a crowd. Especially when you had betrayer attached to your name." the Minotaur mocked.

"That is what's an insult to me!" Geramius cried. The old hag cackled.

That got the younger King's attention as he looked at the fawn that was once trusted enough to be his valet, "Please elaborate."

"With pleasure!" the fawn snapped, "We are to be ruled by the very thing that could have destroyed us! You were part of the White Witch entourage whether you knew it or not. Ignorance was not an excuse. You would have turned in your siblings and doomed us all. And you expect our forgiveness. Worst yet, you expect to rule us when you couldn't even rule yourself."

"This is coming from one who has sided himself with two of the Witches followers." Queen Susan couldn't help but snap out.

Edmund looked over at her sharply and she glared furiously at the group but said no more. Edmund looked backed at Geramius who lifted his chin, looking down at him, "I did what I felt I had to do."

"So you admit you are going against Aslan's will? That you went against his will." Lucy asked softly, questioning his faith.

"Aslan failed us, by giving us a worthless King."

A cry of disgust rang throughout the group even those that were uncomfortable by the Minotaur's words. Peter stood up sharply making Edmund stand up. "My King…please." Was all the latter murmured reaching out and touching Peter's arm.

Peter looked at Edmund, fire in his eyes. The girls were outraged at the fawn's statement and worried about Peter and Edmund. Oreius's gave an angry snort and a firm stamp of his hoof, as he itched to hit the fawn. He held his ground, glancing at the soldiers under his command to not act on their anger that was clearly visible.

Peter opened his mouth but shut it abruptly as he slowly sunk back down in to his throne and if looks could kill the fawn would be dead. Geramius trembled under the might of such a look and he swore he saw a familiar flash of gold across the High King's face but he steadied himself and stood behind his words.

Edmund gazed at his brother a long moment before glaring down at the fawn, "I will not tolerate such blatant disrespect against the King over all Kings in Narnia in our court or our land for that matter. You may insult me if you wish, but you will not say such a thing against Aslan again. You have been warned. Next time, I will allow General Oreius to act on the anger he's so obviously holding back."

Oreius couldn't help the small smirk at this and that made Peter's mouth twitch once in satisfaction.

Geramius couldn't help but lower his head at the reprimand.

The Minotaur laughed once. "Come now, we are suppose to be scared of you? Do you even love your siblings?"

"Of course I do." Edmund answered as he sat back down on his throne.

"Do you? You harbor no jealous against them? Jealous that they are more than you. Jealous even that you were assassinated but none of us hated them as much as you, because there was no threat against them. Oh, they thought there was, but they were never on the radar. Surely a small part of you hates that you were hated so much that we planned all of this to kill you, but your royal siblings were safe the entire time."

"I would not wish what happened to me on anyone...", came the reply.

The Minotaur smirked clearly enjoying this debate, "I see you didn't answer my question completely, but no matter…."

Susan, Lucy and Peter glanced at Edmund worried about what was going through his head. Worried about the things he may have kept to himself, not allowing them even a glimpse. They worried that maybe some of what the Minotaur was saying was true, though he was clearly playing a head game with their brother. To Edmund's credit his didn't blink in the face of what was thrown at him, but on the flip side, that troubled them as well.

"...I know the answer to my own question."

"Then why ask?"

"To see what you would say, King Edmund", his name was said with a sneer.

King Edmund said nothing.

"But..." the Minotaur got the nastiest look he could have which was saying much as he drawled, "...what I want to know is...why you didn't tell them?"

The old hag poked the Minotaur excitedly, "Oh, yes! That was the most fun! Geramius was a big help there, since he was your valet and all. Oh, how does it feel to be betrayed by the one closest to you and the one you least expect? Do tell, do tell, do tell! Do! Tell!"

"Tell them what?" Edmund asked of the Minotaur ignoring the old hag who was almost bouncing in her spot. Oreius watched her warily.

"Oooo...", the Minotaur drawled out clearly enjoying the tension mounting in the room with this new information, "...you know. And you know you know."

"I'd appreciate you getting to a point." the Just King seemed unruffled.

The huge beast paused for affect before he busted out, "About the letters, of course!"

A questioning murmur when throughout the crowd. Peter watching Edmund closely at this moment, saw his younger brother's jaw twitch once, the only give away.

"What letters?" Susan asked.

"Oh, my apologizes, my Queen!" the Minotaur grinned, "But I question if Edmund really trust any of you, especially with the threatening letters he has been getting for the past several weeks. Oh, he never told you about them?"

Peter, Susan and Lucy looked flat out stunned by this. They all looked at Edmund who didn't look at them but instead still glared at the Minotaur.

"I'm so sorry!" the beast mocked, "If I had but known! All those letters, threatening your safety, insulting your honor, if you have any."

Here Oreius couldn't help but look at Edmund trying to read him. He frowned at this. He took the safety of the Kings and Queens very seriously.

The Minotaur continued his ears twitching in excitement, "You can't because if you did, you never would have accepted the crown, but you always wanted to be a king didn't you? Didn't matter how you became king but as long as you were. So of course you weren't going to turn it down. But I have to wonder what would have happened if the letters mentioned your royal family in any way. You would have told no sooner than you finished that line, wouldn't you?"

He laughed boorishly, "Wouldn't you have? But since it was directed solely towards you, you didn't tell them. Why is that? Oh, I must say, you must have some sense, because you actually helped us to kill you by not saying anything. Or at the very least you made our job so much easier! I must say, we have the hag to thank for such a foresight."

The hag cackled, "Oh yes, I figured you didn't care about yourself. You still don't do you? Why else are you letting us continue to talk to you this way? But the moment we drag your family or Aslan into this, you start fighting. But yourself….oh, you will just sit and get run through won't you?"

"You all are lying!" Susan hissed unable to be quiet a moment longer.

The Minotaur grinned, "Oh, but we aren't! Ask him what happened to said letters?"

"What happened to these so called letters, Edmund?" asked Susan leaning forward to try to capture her younger brother's eye.

Edmund said nothing and he didn't look at them.

"Edmund?" Lucy asked softly.

The entire crowd waited quietly for an answer. There was high tension as all eyes were on the youngest King.

"Oh, we can answer that by the way, since your royal brother doesn't seem to want to." The Minotaur raised his hand like an eager school kid.

"I don't remember asking you!" Susan snapped at him before looking expectantly at Edmund.

Peter still hadn't said anything but a deep scowl, that probably would make a permanent mark, was on his face by now as he too looked at Edmund.

"I burned them", Edmund spoke at last.

A loud murmur went up in the halls at this new revelation.

"So you admit there were letters. Threatening letters that you didn't tell us about." Susan asked after a moment's delay, looking at Edmund who still had not looked at any of them. Lucy just stared almost jaw open.

Peter was twitching violently now, his knuckled white as they gripped his armrest. Oreius held his breath waiting for an answer as he stared at the Just King, not understanding why he was just now finding out. Upset that he had just now found out and after the fact. If he had but known...

Millions of possibilities roamed throughout the centaur's mind, but he snapped back waiting for the answer with almost bated breath as everyone else.

"Yes." Came the simple answer a few seconds later.

Susan nodded and Lucy sniffed as she held back the tears. If possible, Peter looked madder.

"Well, at least you did one thing right." The Minotaur spoke up with a smirk, "So in essence, you allowed yourself to be killed."

"I didn't allow anything! Let's get that straight!" Edmund hissed, showing more emotion than he did in the last while.

"But you did by not telling them."

"My reasons are just that _**my**_ reasons", Edmund emphasized, "I don't have to explain anything to the likes of you."

"But really, do you really think that what happened wasn't justice?"

Peter made a move to move but Edmund held out his hand. They glared at each other a long moment making the girls hold their breath. Edmund was surprised that Peter has let it go this far, but as long as he could stall his brother he would. But knew that the Minotaur only had a few steps more to take before Peter blow.

The Minotaur continued, "We all know that you aren't the most beloved sovereign. In fact, if we had a poll right now, even you can't deny that you would be the least favorite and with many a good reason."

Edmund lowered his hand and looked back that the Minotaur as he continued, "In fact you aren't beloved at all. You can't blame us for having the guts to do something about this wrong we feel." He said it as if the Just King was nothing more than a worm.

"Many were wary of you, many dislikes you, some I'm sure hates you, but we were the only ones who had the fortitude to do something about that."

"Hate me enough to want me dead. And to go about killing me." Edmund spoke with a nod, with quiet acceptance that scared the girls as well as Peter.

"Exactly. Is this justice? A betrayer who now rules us? Do you call that justice? Do you really think you are worthy to be sitting up there, judging us?" the Minotaur snorted, "You aren't worth the dirt it took to make you. You should have died on the stone table not Aslan! We are just doing what should have been done long ago."

Edmund's eyes budged at this and the girls looked panicked. Peter shot up from his seat as a loud cry of protest went up in the room.

"SILENCE!" Peter roared and everyone got quiet quick. "I have had enough! I have heard enough and I will not allow this to continue."

The High King could not longer sit back and listen quietly to this.

The Queens looked on the verge of crying but held it back, while King Edmund just stared off blankly.

**TBC….**

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><p>A.N: I was just writing and I realize this chapter got long. I was just going with flow and I forgot about the whole chapter thing. Lol. Had to find a cut off point. Shall continue next chapter...<p> 


	10. CH 9:If I could be happy I wouldn't know

Disclaimer:  As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship. Unfortunately, I do own the assassinator group including Geramius. Yay.

A.N: Continuation of last chapter...

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

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><p>Chapter 9: If I could be happy, I wouldn't know<p>

Edmund's mind was reeling as he thought on the Minotaur's words. He knew about the Stone table, but he never really thought about it. He never connected the obvious dots. He was thrown back to that day a year ago when the White Witch demanded his blood and then awhile later she retracted that. And Edmund never questioned why. He was so happy that he was saved he never questioned why.

But now he knew. He tried hard to hold onto the mask that was slowly breaking.

High King Peter had heard enough, "You come in here and play head games with my royal brother. You have already insulted Aslan not once but twice now. You have insulted my brother many times over and thus have insulted me and my sisters. I will not allow this any longer. Aslan knew what he was doing when he was doing it. Aslan knows what he's doing now while he's doing it. It's not our place to question him. Do you understand that? Edmund was chosen as a fellow King. He has made mistakes but those mistakes have made Edmund a better person and thus a King."

Susan and Lucy nodded glaring at the group, both holding back tears. The crowd murmured amongst themselves but Peter was not finished.

"Yes, Aslan died for Edmund, but he knew what he was doing."

Edmund's head twitched back in Peter's direction though he was still staring absently at a spot on the floor.

"Aslan knew he would return. He set all this up. Why, I don't know and I'm not going to question his will and ways."

Lucy nodded and gave a small clap at this.

"What's more…", Peter continued, his voice cold fury as he took a step towards the group, "Aslan forgave Edmund. Aslan did. Do you understand that? He, King over all Kings, the Son of the Emperor beyond the Sea, the highest being in Narnia forgave Edmund. So what right do you have to judge that? What right does any of you have to judge that?" He cried looking around the room. Some of the Narnians looked guilty at this.

Green-grey eyes flashed fire, "I am appalled, down-right shocked and disgusted to think that some Narnians hated Edmund this much...", Peter looked at the cats, the dryad, the squirrel and the fawn, "...that they would conspire to kill him. In fact, I'm not going to give you the respect of calling you Narnians anymore, fell beasts."

The "Narnians" in the group couldn't help but to winced at this. "You aligned yourself with fell beasts…" Here he looked at the Minotaur and the old hag, "…to come up with this elaborate plot. You don't deserve to call yourself Narnian's anymore."

A roar of approval went up around the room, but Peter still wasn't finished nor did it do anything to quarrel his temper that was still flaming, "What's even more that I'm disgusted to think that there were Narnians under our noses who sneered at Edmund behind his back. Or is it behind me and my sisters backs and to Edmund's face?"

That uncomfortable air seeped back into the large room. Some in the crowd was looking a little ashamed now that their beloved High King was railing against them.

"The past should have been done with the moment that Aslan said it was done." Peter continued a few moments later after letting it sink in and watching some said Narnian's began to squirm, "It shouldn't have carried from the battlefield and into Cair Paravel. And it certainly shouldn't have carried on this far." He paused and looked around the room. "I'm just disappointed in all of you who ever held anything against my royal brother, your king, who tried his best to see to the needs of all of you. To serve as justice because he knows what injustice feels like and this is how you repay him?"

Peter did a slow sweep around the room, "This is what he gets? This is what Aslan gets? This is what how you repay Aslan's sacrifice, by treating one of his children your own brother, your cousin, thusly? Really?"

There were a few loud sniffs and some of the Narnians in the crowd started crying, those that held something against Edmund now truly sorry they did.

Peter looked around once more before turning and sitting back down on his throne. He looked at Edmund who's mask was barely hanging onto a thread. He glanced at his sisters who were anxious about their brother.

"We still have to judge you accordingly and frankly emotions are a little too high now." The High King stated after a few minutes had past looking back at the small group.

Few of them, like the dryad for example, was looking duly chastised and others not caring a whit for what was said.

The High King waved his hand, "Get them out of my sight!"

Orieus was quick to obey as he signaled to his soldiers take the prisoners back to their cells.

"We are in recess for the rest of the day." Peter, the Magnificent, ordered.

He stood up, along with this sisters and brother who stood mechanically and lead them out the side door.

As soon as the door was closed behind them, Peter grabbed Edmund's arm and marched them purposely to a destination. He got to the sitting room and practically pushed Edmund inside. The girls followed.

Edmund took a seat in the chair facing the window, while the girls sat in the window sill seat. Peter began to pace, trying to work off some steam.

"Edmund…..Edmund….what….where…" Susan didn't even know where to begin.

"Edmund, you heard what Peter said. Aslan knew what he was doing." Lucy spoke.

"Why?" That was most broken they heard Edmund be in a long time, "Why? Why didn't any of you tell me? Why did you hide it from me?"

"We didn't want to burden you with it!"

Edmund stood up glaring at his sisters, "Didn't want to burden me with it? What, you guys thought that it wasn't worth telling me? That I shouldn't know? That I shouldn't know what I caused!"

"Please, Edmund, believe us, we wanted to spare you that pain. We love you! You were going through so much. We didn't want to add this burden on your shoulders!" Tears glittered in Lucy's eyes.

"You should have loved me enough to tell me! Aslan should have told me!"

"To what end and purpose?" asked Susan, shooting up from her seat, "Give me one thing it would have changed other than another reason for you to beat yourself up! Give me one and maybe just maybe we can agree then that we should have told you."

Edmund spun around and glared at Peter who was still pacing, "You knew and you didn't tell me, either!"

"Just like you knew about letters and you didn't tell us?" Peter asked glaring at his younger brother.

"That is different!"

"Is it? How?"

"It just is! It had nothing to do with any of you!"

"But it was threatening you!" Peter yelled then after a pause asked, "What did they say?"

Edmund looked away and Peter advanced on him, "You better tell me…."

"Look, it started out harmless. I didn't think they'd actually kill me. Just letters saying that they hated me, that I was not a good King. That an injustice was done, etc. I decided to work harder, that's all. It was a motivation to work harder."

"And not one threatened your life?" Peter pressed.

Edmund's gaze dropped.

"It did!" Peter cried, "And you failed to tell us!"

"No! That's not it!" Edmund snapped looking back up, "In a manner of speaking I suppose it was but…."

"What did it say?"

"It wasn't…."

"What did it say?"

"Peter, I….."

"I will not ask again!" Peter screamed.

Edmund glared at his older brother but Peter returned in tenfold.

"Please, Edmund!" Lucy begged.

Edmund's eyes misted over and he shook his head trying to quell them. "It was the last letter, I got 48 hours before….. That my days were numbered….."

"And you didn't think to come to me or Oreius? I know the general is upset about this." There was a calm fury in Peter's voice.

Edmund glared back up at his brother, "I don't have to explain anything to you! It had nothing to do with you!"

"It had everything to do with me, you little blighter!" Peter roared making the girls jumped. Edmund backed away once, "Do you know what I went through when you were dead? What we went through? Do you? We love you, you moron! And to know that maybe if you had said something this all could have been avoided! Why, why didn't you tell us?"

Edmund snorted and proceeded to walk to the door, but Peter captured his wrist and spun him around. "I'm not finished talking to you!"

"And I have nothing else to say!" Edmund yelled.

"Edmund, Peter, please, calm down", Susan placated.

Lucy rushed forward and laid her hands on top of Peter's hand holding Edmund's wrist. "Let go Peter. Let go."

It took a moment but Peter obeyed. Both brothers were still glaring almost murderously at the other.

"Look, we are still too highly emotional, to high strung, especially the two of you. Go to neutral corners and calm yourselves. Talk later, when we all have a clearer head."

Peter and Edmund seemed to come to some unspoken agreement because Peter didn't try to stop Edmund as he left. He waited a few moments and he left too.

Lucy started crying after a few moments the events catching up to her. Susan came over and hugged her sisters, tears falling down her cheeks.

_Oh, Aslan, please help us_. Was the mantra that repeated in Lucy's head.

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><p>Edmund huffed down the hallway to his room. Thankfully it was clear. He got to his room and like the eleven year old he was, he slammed the door. He ripped his cape off letting it fall to the ground and kicked off his boots, letting them fly every which away. He tore off his outer tunic and flung it on the bed. His crown had become crooked and he snatched it off, but he came to himself just as he was about to hurl it in anger. He stopped and breathed tightly before walking over and reverently laying it back in its box. He leaned over it for awhile staring at it until suddenly, he could do so no longer and slammed the box shut.<p>

A few silent tears tracked down his face but he wiped them away stubbornly. The light that was shining into his room seemed obtrusive so he marched over and closed the curtains. He turned and knocked his tunic on the ground before snatching back the covers and diving under them. He pulled it over his face and scrunched into a ball.

The thought about the dream he couldn't remember anymore came to him, and he found he wanted to dream it again. He wanted to be there again. All he could remember was a good feeling. A blissful feeling that he never felt before. He secretly lamented on that feeling, wishing it to come back. He remember feeling free with no worries, something he had never felt before. He desperately wanted to feel it again. His eyes fluttered and before he knew it, he was asleep.

"_Edmund?" _

_Edmund opened his eyes lazily looking but not seeing anything. _

"_Edmund?" the soft firm voice came again. _

_Edmund blinked and realized that he was laying on his back staring up at the clouds above. It was rather peaceful. _

"_Edmund." _

_He looked around, lifting his head seeing nothing. Then he looked back and saw the familiar gold figure sitting there looking at him. He was upside down. Or rather since he was laying on his back looking back at Aslan who was sitting, said Lion looked in fact upside down. It gave Edmund a fleeting moment of humor. _

_Fleeting...  
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"_Aslan?" _

"_What are you doing, child?"asked Aslan.  
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_Edmund blinked confused, "I….don't understand." _

"_Think about it." _

_Edmund looked rather blankly at the upside form of Aslan.  
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"_Your siblings are worried about you. Worried for you."  
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_Edmund's gaze flickered back to the clouds above him. _

"_You deny this?" _

"_I didn't say anything, Aslan." _

"_Your silence speaks volumes. Sometimes speaking nothing is in fact speaking everything at once." _

"_..." _

"_Have you not done enough running in your young life?" _

"_I am not running." _

"_What would you call it, son?" _

"…" _Edmund got confused. _

_What were they talking about?_

"_You refuse to tell your siblings about the letters. I do remember us having a small chat about this, do you not?" _

"_But they know about it", Edmund protested weakly, "Isn't that enough?" _

_Aslan sighed. "Edmund", his voice was gentle yet firm, "Yes, they know about it now. But you have yet to explain it to them." _

"_But…." _

"_No buts", came the growl sounding much like a parent would lecture their child, "You have the choice to explain it to them or not. Just like you had the choice to tell them about the letters but didn't. Everything happens for a reason, but they are still influences of the choices you make." _

"_Are you trying to say that something bad would happen if I don't explain it to them? Like what? Will they be okay?" _

_Aslan offered no answer making Edmund look back at him, albeit the fact that the Lion was still upside down. Edmund had yet to move or even think about moving.  
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"_Aslan…why didn't you tell me?" _

"_And what would that have prove, dear son?", came the answer. _

_Sort of. _

_Both knew what topic they were on now. _

_Edmund shut his eyes. "Susan asked a similar question." _

"_You have not answered her and you have yet to give me answer. You are in the habit of avoiding to answer questions directly and in full. But we both know that's because there isn't one, is there, in this instance at least?" _

_It was a few seconds but Edmund slowly nodded his head in agreement. _

"_What's done is done. We cannot undo the past but we can influence the future. I would hope you know this and act accordingly. I made you King for a reason, Edmund, and I would hope that you would not allow anyone to dissuade you from the path I set you on. Not even yourself. And not allow anyone to cause you to doubt yourself. But that is what you did, isn't it? Doubted yourself. In part that's what made you not tell your siblings, under the guise that since it didn't directly deal with them, it wasn't their problem." _

"_And the other part?" Edmund opened his eyes. _

"_You tell me." _

_Edmund shut his eyes again. _

"_Tell me." _

_Edmund mumbled under this breath. _

_Aslan's face was grave. "I know, now…..tell them. Tell Peter." _

"Edmund!"

Edmund heard his name being called but tried to stay in the little cocoon he was comfortable in.

"Edmund, please!"

He frowned hearing the desperation in the voice and his eyes flew open.

"Oh, thank Aslan!" Peter sagged against his younger brother.

Edmund blinked and looked over his shoulder, pulling the covers further way from his face. He saw his older brother's head down and felt his hands digging into his shoulder. He was sitting next to him.

"What's wrong?" asked Edmund confused momentarily.

Peter shook his head but didn't look up, "I dunno. I just came in and called your name and you wouldn't answer. I saw everything thrown all over the place. That made me worry more. Then I called you again. You still wouldn't answer. I jumped on the bed, not a movement." Here Peter's voice broke. "I had to shake you and call you a few times until you finally stirred. I was two seconds away from getting a healer or something. I thought….that…" his voice broke even more and he couldn't speak.

"Oh Peter, I'm okay." Edmund turned over on his back to look at his older brother whose hands still somehow managed to grip his arm.

"I didn't want….I can't….."

"Hey, hey…come on", Edmund murmured, pulling Peter down. Peter followed Edmund's tug and laid down, throwing an arm over him and burying his face in his shoulder.

"I'm okay." Edmund repeated softly looking up at the ceiling.

"I can't do that again. I can't", Peter spoke brokenly.

There was a lull before Edmund opened his mouth.

"I was dreaming", he offered, "I was talking to Aslan."

Peter's arm tightened around Edmund's body. "What he say?"

"You know Aslan. He gives you an answer without giving you an answer. And then he tells you the answer way later in a roundabout way, sometimes answering the first question you had, that's if you're lucky."

Peter lifted his head and although his eyes were wet, he stared down at Edmund with a slightly confused face, "Strangely I followed that" a pause as he studied his brother who continued to stare up at the ceiling, "Are you okay?" he asked.

"Yea, I'm okay. I just…" Edmund trailed off.

"Just...", Peter propped himself on his elbow to watch his younger brother's face.

"Did you want something?" Edmund asked instead, his voice soft.

Peter looked down at him, not understand why Edmund chooses to dodge questions lately.

"I just….."

"How long was I out?" Edmund asked abruptly.

"I dunno, how long you were asleep if that's what you mean. It's been a few hours since we've seen each other last. Evening is settling in. I didn't expect you to be asleep."

"I didn't expect to fall asleep."

"I didn't expect to come into your room and near trip over your cape either." Peter glanced over his shoulder at it.

Edmund turned his face away from this older brother closing his eyes. Silence floated for awhile and it had an edge of tenseness. It helped Peter to feel the steady breathes that his younger brother was taking by the way his arm was moving up and down on his brother's chest was keeping him from completely losing it. He didn't know if he wanted to scream in frustration and beat an answer out of Edmund or cry and plead and beg the answer out of Edmund.

And he wasn't above doing the latter.

In fact...

"Why won't you talk to me?" Peter started, his mouth working momentarily like a fish before he was able to continue, "Talk to us. What's wrong?" The he ventured quietly, "Did I do something to upset…"

"NO!" Edmund cried so vehemently that Peter jumped a little and stared at him with wide eyes.

Edmund looked back at Peter fiercely, "You have done nothing. Nothing at all. Never did and never will. Forgo that thought."

"Then why?" Peter cried, tears spilling over his cheeks making Edmund turn away much to the older brother's displeasure but he continued, "I just want an answer to something. Anything."

"Like why the sky is blue?"

"Don't get smart with me Edmund!" Peter snapped.

Edmund sat up making Peter's arm fall into his lap in surprise. Peter lifted his hand and rested in on his brother's shoulder. "What are you doing?" He asked quietly.

He could see his brother struggling but with what Peter couldn't begin to imagine.

"I. Can't." Edmund finally managed to choked out. "I. Just. Can't."

"Can't what? Why?" Peter tried to keep his voice gentle but the pleading was still evident.

"It's…" Edmund stopped.

Peter waited patiently, wiping away the tears on his face, focusing on his brother.

"I just can't", Edmund repeated and Peter could just barely hear him. He was startled when Edmund threw back the covers and got out of bed, sitting looking at the curtains.

He knew that he needed to do what Aslan said and tell his brother but he couldn't. He feared he couldn't do what Aslan wanted this time. If anything, he didn't want to disobey him, in fact he refused but in this instance he feared he wouldn't be able to keep up that silent vow he made a long time ago to always obey Aslan and never question him.

Edmund knew he was at a crossroads and both paths seemed dark to him. He knew not which road to take. He was frightened.

"As long as the three of you are okay, it's okay." he finally managed to speak, his voice soft.

"No it isn't!" Peter hissed, crawling over and situating himself next to Edmund looking at his profile, "You are a part of us, Edmund. How do you think we felt when you were gone? How do you think we felt when we almost lost you a year ago, when we lost you this time, no matter how brief? How do you think we felt? How do you think I felt laying next to the cold body of my dead brother trying to convince myself that you were just asleep, that if I gave you some time, your stubborn little behind would wake up."

Edmund didn't say anything though he glanced out the corner of his eye at his older brother.

"Why didn't you tell us about the letters?" questioned Peter.

"Why didn't you tell me about Aslan?" Edmund shot back.

"What good would it have done?"

Edmund gave a wry chuckle looking down at his hands with a nod. It seemed that it always came back to that question when it came to that situation.

"Why didn't you tell us about the letters, Edmund?" Peter asked again, pressing his brother to answer him. He would not let this rest until he got something out of Edmund. If it took the next year, he would keep it up.

"They weren't directed towards you."

It was a start, even if it was a repeat of what Peter already knew.

"I know that, but why didn't you tell us anyway? What made you bear this yourself?"

Something inside Edmund snapped as he shot up and turned to Peter who was shocked at this abrupt action, "Because they were right! They are right! This first year was hard for me okay? It was hard and some days it was pure torture! Everywhere I looked, I saw mistrust and suspicion in Narnian's eyes. Sometimes I saw pure hatred towards me but I didn't complain, because I knew I deserved it. I deserve it! And I know that! I knew I would have to prove myself. I would have to try to earn what could be mine to claim and I don't complain about that. Everything I have, no matter how little or how grand it is, I had to earn. So I did, I worked and worked and I worked myself to exhaustion sometimes, but still I didn't complain. I would not dare. I do not dare."

Edmund began to pace stopping at points to gesture his words with his hands. Peter sat quietly, watching and listening to something that has been building up for an entire year, "Do you know what it's like? Of course not! None of you do and for that I thank Aslan ten times over and beyond. You don't know what it's like to make a mistake and have it haunt and dodge your every footsteps. You don't know what it's like to walk into a room full of people and know that when they look at your siblings they see perfection, as they should, but if their gaze happens to land on you, they are wary. You don't know what it's like to be in a crowd of people and be screaming at the top of your lungs and no one turns because no one hears, or maybe they hear but they don't care! You don't know what it's like to be a shadow, to know you are less to them than the ground they are walking on. You don't know what that's like!" Edmund screamed tears pouring down his face.

Peter's shut his eyes briefly, tears already running down his cheeks. He felt his brother's pain as sharply as it was his own.

"And I don't want you or our sisters to know, believe me. So you can never truly understand. But then after some months, I saw that many began to have a begrudging respect. The suspicion began to wane a little and for that I was grateful. I felt I was doing something right. I was earning their respect. I would not claim their love for I deserve it not, but maybe I felt, I could be respected, so I didn't have to walk into a room every time and feel as though no one wanted me there. I harbor no jealous against you or Lucy or Susan but it was hard to watch."

Here Edmund slowed his fast talking and spoke a little more calmer. "It was hard to see how easy the Narnians were with you, with Susan, and name me one person that thought a bad thought about Lucy. I loved each one of you for that that. But even though I did, it was still hard to watch. You walk into a room and your magnificence fills it."

Peter blushed at this poetic-ness.

"Susan walks into a room and comfort is sent winging throughout the air. Lucy walks into a room, and joy is spread about like a virus, contagious." Edmund paused his eyes and voice lowering before speaking, "I walk into a room and I bring tension. I bring those hurtful reminders. But I've accepted that. Things are better now than in the beginning but it still lingers like a sore wound."

"And the letters?" asked Peter quietly after a moment had passed.

Edmund swallowed before sinking back down on the bed, looking at the ground. "The first one that came, I thought was somewhat a joke. I took it seriously, and gave a long look at myself to see if anything was lacking. So I tried harder. Then more letters came, each becoming more violent and threatening. But always were they directed at me, never you or our sisters."

"So, why didn't you tell us?"

Edmund was silent a long while making Peter fear he would not answer until he heard his voice, "You guys had enough to deal with. I would not be a reason for an unrest. And if I told, it would be a reason. I knew I deserved their wrath if they felt I was not living up to what they expected. I have to work so much harder than you or our sisters and I know that. I accepted that and I do it without complaint. If someone feels I'm not owning up to what I need to do, then I want them to tell me. I knew that many Narnians, not all, did not want me on the throne, in the first place. Granted there were Narnians that cared not about my past, and accepted me right away, like Oreius, and that comforted me."

"Still, that is no reason to kill you!" Peter hissed vehemently flinching at the memories his own words invoked.

"I never really expected that any Narnian would actually hate me so much to want me dead. To actually come up with a plan and carry it out. I was wrong. Very wrong. I wanted to believe that no one hated me that much. I was wrong but….." here Edmund trailed off.

"But….." Peter prompted.

"..."

"Edmund?" Peter touched his brother's shoulder.

Edmund looked away making sure his face was not visible to Peter.

"Edmund, please", Peter begged.

"."

"Wha?" Peter couldn't understand what Edmund had muttered.

"I said, I deserved it."

"Edmund!" Peter cried shocked at such an admission.

"What? It's true!" Edmund cried whipping his head back to Peter, "I just…I knew as long as they did not threatened you and our sisters not, anything else I could deal with."

"You will not say such a thing again!" Peter all but screamed, jumping to his feet. He spun around and gripped Edmund's shoulder tears in his eyes again. He blinked them away to see his younger brother properly who was looking way from Peter.

"It's the truth!" Edmund growled.

"Did you ever think about us? What we would feel? Did you ever stop for one moment and think about us in this?" Peter whispered furiously.

"I didn't want to cause any trouble." snapped Edmund, "The three of you were so happy, ecstatic, everyday waking up and looking forward to all the things planned. As you should. I would not be the one to take away that happiness."

"But you weren't happy! You cannot tell me you were either!" Peter hissed shaking Edmund once, "You were suffering silently this whole time and we had no hint that it was going on." he murmured forlornly, easing the grip he had on his brother's shoulders.

Peter flopped back down next to him

He touched his brother's arm looking at his dejected posture, "We should have paid attention more." He spoke with regret.

"No." Edmund stated firmly, "We have a bigger picture to look at here. We have a kingdom to run. You don't have time to come running every time I call you."

Peter glared at him through his tears, "When have you ever called me?"

"..."

"My point exactly!" exclaimed Peter, "You never tell us anything, preferring to suffer silently. They are four thrones in Cair Paravel, one of which is yours. You say look at the bigger picture, did you forget you are part of that picture? Four corners of the picture represent each of us. You want to explain to me, how in Aslan's name, are three corners supposed to hold what it takes four to do? You can't because it can't be done, Edmund!"

Peter couldn't tell if he was getting through his younger brother or not. He took a deep steadying breath trying to calm down, though his heart threatened to beat out of his chest and asked quietly, "Did you really think we wanted that for you? That we wanted you to suffer so long like this. What would Susan or Lucy say?"

Edmund only glanced at Peter. He opened his mouth and shut it along with his eyes. "I…."

Peter shook Edmund softly after a moment had passed and asked barely above a whisper, "What?" There was another pause. He saw then that Edmund was trying to build walls. "Edmund, please, tell me. You'll feel better. Do you really think Aslan wants this for you?"

Edmund shook his head, but Peter didn't know if he was answering his question or not. He wasn't sure what was going though the younger boy's mind anymore. He hadn't for so long and it disturbed him something fierce.

"No…." finally came the choked response, "Aslan wouldn't want this. I know that. I know that you and Lucy or Susan wouldn't want this, but it's…..so hard….."

"What is?"

"You've never felt…." Edmund fidgeted agitated.

"Felt?" Peter's threw an arm around Edmund's shoulders trying to comfort him.

"I don't deserve it. I don't deserve to be happy and I certainly don't deserve to destroy you, Susan's and Lucy's happiness. You were happy, do you get that?" Edmund's eyes blazed as he looked at Peter directly for the first time during the start of this conversation, "You and our sisters were happy, truly. You are happy, it radiates off of you. In fact Lucy is practically the sun itself. And I would do anything not to taint that. I would do anything to protect that. Do you understand that?"

"At the cost of your own happiness? Even with your very life? By suffering by yourself?" came the fierce questioning.

"If need be." came the quiet admittance.

"You are a blockhead, Edmund. We want you to be happy." Then Peter mocked Edmund's question flinging it back in his face, "Do you understand that?"

"I can't!" Edmund yelled shutting his eyes tightly as the tears leaked through, "I've tried, but I can't." Edmund's voice got quieter, "I don't know how. I don't know how to be happy. I really don't. I haven't been happy in a long time. I don't even remember what it feels like. Even before we came here, I haven't felt such thing in….I don't know when. And I've tried to be happy but I found I couldn't. Not really. Not really. Then I thought that….maybe….."

"Maybe what, Edmund?" Peter murmured, stifling his sobs as his brother's confession. He never would have imagined the things that his younger brother managed to hide from them.

From him.

Edmund shrugged, "Maybe….I don't really deserve to be happy."

"Oh, Edmund", Peter cried unable to holding back as he leaned his head on his brother's shoulder, crying for the pain his brother felt and was going through.

Edmund's face was a little absent as he opened his eyes and looked unseeing in front of him as silent tears flowed down, "Maybe its part of my penance. I've accepted that."

**TBC….**

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><p>A.N: *sniffs* Aww, poor Edmund. At least everything is out on the table now...<p>

I should have known that I'd probably beat the length of last chapter, lol. Once I start re-editing these kind of chapters when everything (or most everything) is explain, it tends to get longer. But I love when it does, more fun that way. =D **  
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	11. CH 10: If U could be happy, I would know

Disclaimer:  As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship.

A.N: I want to thank all my Narnian readers! I've enjoyed reading and replying to the reviews I'm getting. I hope this chapter does not disappoint!

I also hope everyone enjoyed that last chapter although it was a lot to take in at once, I'm sure. Poor Edmund. *sniff* Hopefully, Peter will find the right words to say...

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

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><p>Chapter 10: If you could be happy, I would know<p>

Peter's sobs died down after awhile until he was taking deep and steadying breaths. Edmund sat quietly, being held but his brother, silent tears sometimes dripping down his face.

"Edmund….Ed..." Peter murmured, "This is destroying you. You have to let the past go. You have to forgive yourself and allow yourself to be happy."

"I don't know how." Edmund spoke brokenly.

"Give it to Aslan." Peter ordered firmly.

Edmund pulled back and looked at Peter. "What?"

"Give. It. To. Aslan." Peter enunciated.

"I have."

"No you haven't!" snapped Peter, "Because if you did, we wouldn't be here. You might think you have. And you might have convinced yourself you did, but if you truly did, such emotion would not have come out. In fact it wouldn't have been in you to come out. You cannot argue with me on that. You know I'm right. In your heart of hearts, somewhere in your spirit, you know I'm right."

Edmund swallowed hard and looked away from Peter. He felt a touch guide his gaze back.

Green-grey eyes met dark brown.

"Edmund, my brother..." Peter's voice was imploring yet firm and gentle, "...you have to let this go. Aslan did what he did. He had a bigger plan than you, me and anyone else could see. No one could see or can see and probably couldn't even began to understand. His ways aren't our ways. This you know. Aslan died for you, for me, for Narnia so she could reclaim her former glory. He made you King of Narnia because he knew that you would be a good King."

Here Peter paused briefly, searching his brother's eyes for some sign that he was getting through. He prayed to Aslan to give him the words he sought. The words that Edmund needed to hear.

The words that would get through to him once and for all.

"You are the Just King because you know what injustice looks like. You had to learn it and I'm sorry you had to learn it the way you did, but maybe it was the only way. I don't know, but it doesn't matter anymore. I know it will still be a part of you and I understand that. Mistakes will always be a part of us, but they are also there to learn and grow from. But they shouldn't overwhelm you. They should never do that. Give it to Aslan and this time mean it. You aren't perfect and you shouldn't seek to be. I'm not perfect no matter how much you want to protest otherwise. Lucy and Susan aren't perfect either. None of us are perfect beings, except Aslan. Let it go. Let him deal with it. In fact he already has, but you can't seem to see that."

Peter wiped away the tears flowing down Edmund's cheeks hoping something was getting to him. He prayed to Aslan himself that it was getting to him. He was running out of words that weren't repeats.

"Please, brother, if you can't find it in yourself to do it for yourself, then do it for me. Do it for our sisters. Do it for your love of Narnia. Narnia needs its Just King, no matter what a small fraction may or may not say. Or may or may not do. Take but one of us out of the equation and our rule will fall. Aslan knew this. This is why he went to the Stone Table because he knew the end result. He would return, you would be saved, all of Narnia would be saved and the White Witch and her winter would be gone forever. When you….." Here Peter stopped, his eyes lowering. He just sat there absently for a few moments.

Edmund cocked his head waiting for Peter to continue.

It took a moment for Peter to do so.

Snapping out of it, he continued quietly, lifting his eyes back to Edmund's, "When you were...assassinated...and you...died...I knew...I wouldn't...be able...to go much longer."

It took everything in Peter to admit it out loud. To say it and acknowledge what could have happened. He didn't want to think to deeply on the what-ifs of this particular scenario. It would overwhelm him.

It nearly did.

When he arrived in his room some hours ago, he was so mad. He had never felt such anger before. He kept walking around his room, trying hard to calm down. Somewhere in there he managed to take off his crown, cape, and boots. It was something to do to expend energy at least, but all the while his thoughts were whirling.

He was mad that Edmund blatantly refused to tell him anything. But then he was scared for Edmund as well. Knowing then that Edmund had kept things from them and was still keeping things from them, scared him. It scared him because he had began to see that the things Edmund were hiding were self-destructive. That the things he was keeping from them, from him, was slowly destroying his younger brother.

He had almost lost him once to the White Witch.

And he rejoiced when he did not, but he could never revisit those memories with any kind of peace. When they did pop up in his mind, he would shudder and thank Aslan that Edmund had lived.

But then to lose him to something so mundane as an arrow.

An arrow!

And it wasn't even a battle where Peter could have had the chance to stop it. To change it.

Something.

Anything!

Peter couldn't wrap his mind around it. And then he found himself breaking into something of maniacal laughter behind that, which quickly turned into sobs, when the thought of what would have happened if Aslan hadn't come.

What-if scenarios played vividly in his head, and all of a sudden Peter found himself panicking and unable to breath. He felt the very walls were closing in on him as he looked for an exit. He bolted to the door and threw it open. He ran to Edmund's room, needing to see him.

Needing to see and feel him breath.

Peter shuddered at the memory as his brother's voice snapped him back to the present.

"Oh, Peter, you would have been fine." Edmund tried to console, trying to convince even himself of this, though he wasn't aware of it.

Peter glared at him with fresh tears in his eyes at the memories, "No I wouldn't either. I wasn't. You think your death wouldn't have an impact on us, on me? Are you that daft? I hope to Aslan not! Don't you get it? I spent the entire three days at your side. The. Entire. Edmund. Is it clicking in your head yet?"

Edmund's eyes widen as he swallowed hard, looking away only to have his gaze guided back once more.

"They wanted to bury you. Put you in a coffin and put you in the tomb and have a grand funeral. I refused. I had your body brought back to my room and I stayed there with you. I barely ate, barely slept. All I did was pray to Aslan, convincing myself that you were only asleep, that you'd wake up soon. I convinced myself not to used the word dead anywhere near your name. And the only emotion I showed was when Oreius came and told me they got them. I was ready to go down there and hack them to pieces, forgetting the justice that should be done! Oreius had to almost fight me!"

"Oh, Peter, please tell you didn't fight Oreius!" Edmund groaned.

"I said, almost, dear brother. I didn't want to fight him, he didn't want to fight me and we both knew I couldn't fight him. He's the general for a reason. But the point was in order to stop me when I went into a bloody rage and was seeing nothing but red, he had to threaten to fight me. I bless Oreius a thousand times and more now, but that is what made me realized for the first time in days that you were dead! You. Were. Dead….." Peter's voice choked as he shut his eyes only to start sobbing again.

It was Edmund this time that had to throw his arms around Peter, trying to comfort him. Peter hung onto Edmund with all his might.

"I had forgotten justice in that instance", Peter sobbed, "I'm not named justice for a reason. I'm too ruled by emotion, especially when it concerns those closest to me." Here he pulled back to look at Edmund, "Lucy couldn't be Justice because she's too sweet. She'd pardon a murder and just you wait, you'll see that before this trial is over. And Susan is too gentle heart-ed to hurt a fly. She's a nurturer. But you, you can shut off your emotions and see all points of view before giving your ruling and that's a good thing. To a point, Edmund. To a point. You shouldn't shut off your emotions when it matters most. You were always the clever one in the family, Edmund and you use that every day. You are shadow, a sponge soaking up what's happening around you and then you are able to have forethought and act accordingly. I can't do that."

Here Peter sat up, placing both of his hands on Edmund's shoulders. He didn't break eye contact and Edmund found he couldn't either. His hands fell to grip Peter's arms.

"Don't you see, Ed?" Peter whispered intensely, "Can't you see? You are needed, my brother. As a brother, as a fellow King, as you. I pray you believe that. I pray that you trust me enough to believe me."

There was no hesitation. "I do trust you."

It was not lost on Peter that Edmund said that he trusted Peter but he didn't say that he believe him.

Peter couldn't help but to shake him once. "Do you? Do you really? Do you really trust me?" he asked, searching his brother's eyes.

"Of course!" Edmund exclaimed, "You are my brother, my liege lord. I do trust you. Completely."

"But you don't believe me."

Edmund swallowed and looked away momentarily, "I want to believe you. It's hard."

"But you trust me enough to tell you the right things? You trust Aslan enough for him to tell you the right things?" pressed Peter.

Edmund looked back at his older brother, "Yes!"

"Then I'm begging you. I'll get on my hands and knees, if that's what it takes to convince you to give it to Aslan and be done with it. Let it be done. Please! Let. It. Be. Done. You have Aslan's favor, that is why you are King. We have Aslan's favor, which is why we are Kings and Queens, why we were brought to Narnia in the first place. It was set in motion before we even knew what motion was. So bask in that and let it be done. Don't let the White Witch win. Don't let anyone else win for that matter. I saw some of those Narnians that started to cry, ashamed of their thoughts previous, whatever they might have been. I know many didn't think of it as going against Aslan as they did. Aslan himself pardoned you. The highest being in all of Narnia pardoned you, so what right do they, me or even you have to discredit that by thinking thoughts against that? And Aslan forbid, carrying out such thoughts as this group did."

Edmund nodded slowly lowering his eyes.

Peter tightened his grip on Edmund's shoulders, "I think you will be happy, Edmund. In fact I know it. It may take a little time, but I know you have the potential to be happy, everyone does. I'll see to it that I help you be happy, for real, this time, but you have to talk to me and our sisters if something is bothering you to this point or to any point. We may have a kingdom to watch out for, but we can't forget about strengthening each other. Sometimes we fall. And we will but we need to be there for each other so we can help each other up. Are you following me, Ed?"

Edmund nodded and lifted his head and looked at Peter, "Yes. I do."

Peter cocked his head, studying Edmund trying to read him. Edmund was always hardest for him to read. It has gotten vastly easier since they came to Narnia but sometimes it was still hard. He harbored regret about not paying enough attention to Edmund. Granted, he guessed since they were all so happy, that they just unconsciously assumed that everyone else was, because everything was going so smoothly.

He never imagined that Edmund was suffering silently. Not like he knew Edmund was now. It never occurred to him. He ducked his head, lost in his thoughts. The idea of Edmund standing in a crowd with them around screaming at them to hear him and they didn't made him ill. The thought of them simply ignoring it, made him want to throw up.

How many signs did he missed?

He knew that Edmund worked himself to the bone. He knew that Edmund had exhausted himself but he to was exhausted at times, so he never thought much behind it. Maybe if he had paid closer attention and saw that Edmund was working himself too much maybe he could have done something then.

Maybe….

"Peter!"

Said male snapped out of it and blinked up at his younger brother.

"If I let this go, you are going to have to as well. I know you are trying to think if you missed anything or something."

Peter gave a sheepish grimacing of a smile. He was always an open book to his brother and he desperately wanted to return the favor.

Edmund looked at the curtains, seeing through into the night that was settling itself. The room was darker, casting shadows. Peter watched as Edmund wiped his face and stood proceeding to light the candles around his room.

Peter sniffed and wiped away his own tears. "I think we're late for dinner", he said finally after Edmund finished lightening the last candle.

"Late is an understatement." Edmund murmured, his back to Peter. He hadn't turned around from lightening the last candle.

Peter stood and walked towards the door, pausing to pick up the cape and brush off the dirt. "Why is this on the floor?"

Edmund glanced over his shoulder as Peter proceeded to hang it up. "I dunno. I was so mad, I just started tearing all that off. I dunno, I guess on some level in bothered me to have it on. As if I was tainting all this…..this….goodness."

Peter pausing in his picking up of his brother's outer tunic. He didn't know what to say behind that.

"I almost hurled my crown." Edmund heard Peter's gasp, "I came to myself in time. Besides I don't think Aslan would have been pleased with such an action."

"I wouldn't be pleased", Edmund heard his brother murmur and he heard a click, knowing that Peter had opened the box with his crown to look at it. He turned around and joined his brother at looking at his crown.

"Do you...ever feel you are unworthy of such a thing?" Edmund ventured asking hesitantly.

"Every day I wake up and every time I have to wear it." Peter answered without pause, honestly.

It shocked Edmund who stared at him jaw ajar. "What?"

Peter chuckled and looked at him, "I'm always wondering, am I doing the right thing? What if I mess up? It's not just me that fails if I do, or even just the four of us, but so many depend on my decision. That's a heavy weight."

"I know, but still, to feel unworthy? You? You are great King. I always knew that you'd make a great King. There was never any doubt in my mind about that."

Peter scrunched up his face, "Before this hero-worship goes any further…."

Edmund smirked at this and the two shared a small laugh before becoming somber.

Peter continued, "Like I said, I'm not perfect, no matter what you think. I want to do the best job I can. And I want this land to prosper and flourished. I intend it to be so."

"You are doing a wonderful job thus far." Edmund looked back at his crown.

"We….are doing a wonderful just thus far", Peter corrected seriously, looking at his younger brother intently.

Edmund looked back at him.

"Don't forget, we have a joint rule. There is no one higher throne than the other. We are all needed to make this rule work. That includes you, if you need it spelled out for you. I'm sure if you asked Susan or Lucy the same question they'd have a similar answer. But maybe that's one reason Aslan chose us. We don't let our pride get in the way and think our way is right and we always remember him." Peter's eyes took a forlorn look, "I had….forgotten Aslan momentarily when I lost my mind and wanted to kill them." He shuddered.

"Oh, Peter. I would have had a hard time not feeling that way as well. I probably would have wanted to do the same you did. Maybe worse."

Peter came back to himself and looked at Edmund, "But that was a mistake I made. See, I'm not perfect. I have asked Aslan's forgiveness for not waiting on him. Oreius all but knocked me in the head with his hoofs to make me see reason. I'm thankful to him for that. In fact, mental note, to thank him personally later."

Edmund gave a small smile, "I shall add my gratitude for keeping you firmly on the ground."

Peter returned the small and reverently closed the box. He looked at Edmund, "How about a late dinner? Maybe we can catch up with our sisters. They will have questions."

Edmund nodded stiffly, "Yes, you are right. They deserve to know something."

Peter nodded.

There was a long silence that followed, neither making a move to even go to the door. They both got lost in their thoughts.

Edmund was deep inside of himself, thinking on all that his brother and liege lord had said this evening. He thought deeply on the matter. He knew that Peter was right. He hadn't given it to Aslan. He thought he did, but he didn't. Because if he had, he wouldn't have wound up where he was now. And he couldn't stay in this place he was in now.

He was slowly destroying himself.

In turn he was destroying his brother.

And his sisters.

He winced when he thought that in an indirect way if something didn't change he would be the one to destroy their rule. As much as Edmund would have wanted to deny it, Peter was right. Their joint rule, included him as well. If he was not well, then it would be like dominoes falling off. Edmund didn't want to be the weaker link. He wanted to be through considering himself the weaker link. He wanted, in his own eyes, to be equal to his siblings. He wanted to believe that within himself.

And no matter how much he wanted to deny this, all of this to himself, this was so. He thought of Peter pleading with him with no shame.

Edmund swallowed. He meant what he told Peter. He trusted him. Completely.

Just as he trusted Aslan completely.

But did he really?

If he hadn't given it to Aslan, then did he really trust him as completely as he wanted to believe?

He pondered long and deep on this.

No, if he wanted to completely trust Aslan, he needed to give everything to the Great Lion.

He needed to let this go.

Not only for the sake of this kingdom or his siblings or their rule.

But for himself.

He wanted it for himself as well.

He was tired of doubting, tired of looking over his shoulder.

Tired of not knowing the right path.

Just tired.

And he was tired of being tired.

So he resolved, right then and there to give it to Aslan. He shut his eyes briefly praying for the strength to let it go.

For Aslan to help.

Not to desert him.

He prayed for forgiveness for his stupidity.

He prayed to be a better person, a better brother, a better king.

He prayed.

And slowly, he began to feel better. Slowly, he could feel that weight that had been there for seemingly so long, slowly began to lift. He knew that it would take him awhile to fully began to heal, but it was a start wasn't it?

And the hardest part was just starting.

He opened his eyes. "Pete?"

"Yes, Ed."

Edmund bit his lip once before sighing, "I'm sorry."

"What are you apologizing for?" Peter asked sharply eyeing Edmund.

Edmund took a deep breath and let it out, "You were right. I should have told you guys so much before now."

"Ed….."

"No, let me finish! You were right. You are right. I haven't given this to Aslan, not truly, and if I want to be the best King I can be, do the job right and to do the best I can and operate in Aslan's will then I have to give him all this and let him deal with it. He sees so much more than we do and I have to remember that. Always. I pray that he'd help me let it go. I want to let it go. I need to. It's not easy though. Because there are times you unconsciously want to or do snatch it back and toy with it."

"Aslan will help you if you let him. If you find that you've taken it back again, give it back to him. And when you realized you are toying with it yet again, give it back to him yet again. Keep doing that. And it'll get to a point where you'll realize that you haven't gone near the cookie aisle in awhile, to snatch the cookies."

"What!" laughed Edmund, "Dear Aslan, we need to get some food into you before you come up with another food related analogy."

"Well, I'm hungry, brother dearest." Peter complained with a lopsided grin.

Edmund rolled his eyes, "Baring food related analogies aside, you're right."

"Aslan knows that sometimes it's hard and sometimes you keep inching back for that last slice of pie." Peter's mouth twitched as Edmund rolled his eyes again, "But he's patient. He'll let you toy with the pie until you realize it and move on. Then like a 5 year old, you'll be back, but one day you'll grow up and that pie will cooled and you have all but forgotten that pie. Or at the very least moderation. And then maybe you'll noticed the pie there and wonder why you ever wanted a slice." Here Peter turned his head way in sort of a 'what am I saying or talking about' expression.

"By the Lion, let's go eat Pete! You got me craving apple pie", Edmund groaned punching his brother playfully as he lead the way to the door.

"I could go for some myself."

"Not if I get there first!" Edmund challenged throwing the door open and running down the hallway, past the guards. They stared after him, blinking in shock. But then they heard the Just King laugh and realized they never really heard him laugh. Not like that anyway.

It was a wonderful sound to their ears.

"Now wait just one moment!" Peter yelled charging after his brother with his own laugh.

The guards glanced at each other with small smiles as they heard the bickering fade away.

It seemed there might me a few unexpected changes to occur.

**TBC…..**


	12. CH 11: Deciding Judgment

Disclaimer:  As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship.

A.N: I think things are lightening up now, don't you? Please enjoy the next chapter. Some fun before some serious.

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

* * *

><p>Chapter 11: Deciding Judgment<p>

Lucy and Susan just happened to step into the hallway when their brothers came flying by almost knocking them down. They blinked at such a strange, yet after they assimilated it in their minds, pleasing picture.

"Sorry, we are racing for apple pie!" Edmund called out disappearing down the hallway.

"Meet us in the dining room!" cried Peter as he also sped by.

Ignoring their so called queenly dignity, Susan and Lucy grinned at each other and tore after their brothers.

Edmund was the first to burst into the dining room, startling the servants. "Do you have any apple pie?" he asked.

They blinked as Peter skidded to a stop, a few seconds behind. "Apple pie!" he confirmed.

"Hey, I got here first, so I get the pie first!"

"Oh, don't be a such a child, there is enough for both of us."

"Then why in the world did we run all the way here?" Edmund cried.

"I don't know! You took off running and I certainly wasn't going to be left behind so I ran after you." Said Peter as he walked over and sat down.

"You mean you chased after me." Edmund amended for his brother as he took his seat.

"Ran after, chased, potato, pototo", murmured Peter as the girls came behind them watching their bickering with surprised but happy expressions. They each took a seat.

"I could have saved my breath then." Edmund muttered under his breath, "You just kept talking about food."

"Using a few food related analogies hardly account for talking about food", Peter injected.

"Whatever."

"Shouldn't you have a decent meal before the pie?" Lucy asked as a whole pie was seated in front of them.

The High King shrugged, "Why not splurge today and just eat pie for dinner?"

Susan crinkled her nose, "That is not healthy."

"But it is good." Edmund spoke around his bit of pie.

"Hey! You haven't even waited of a plate!" cried Susan.

"Why wait for a plate? We'll eat it eventually", Peter said, taking a bit of his pie he got with his fork.

Lucy giggled making her older sister glare at her so she tried to pretend she wasn't laughing.

"I will not have brothers acting like three year olds! And I'm ordering the two of you a plate." Susan signaled to a servant whose mouth was twitching.

Peter grinned, "Then you better tell them to hurry, cause if the food gets here and we are full from pie, it's curtain for that."

"Hear! Hear!" Edmund agreed.

"Oh, not you too Lucy!" Susan groaned.

"Hey, I ate my food."

"Use a plate."

"So get me a plate and I might use it." Laughed Lucy.

If it wasn't against Queenly dignity, Susan would have let her head smack down on the table.

"Fine, but if you guys wake up at night with a tummy ache, don't complain to me about it, because all I'll do is roll over with a I-told-you-so."

"You can be such a spoilsport", Edmund murmured as the food arrived for him and his brother.

"It's called logic, brother dearest!" Susan said sweetly.

"However you dress a turkey, it's still a turkey!"

"Shut up and eat. Now you doing food related analogies", Peter snorted.

"And for that I am sorry", Edmund murmured taking a bite of his food.

This was what Oreius was greeted with as he walked into the dining room. He had guards telling him about the strange sight so he had to investigate for himself.

Just to make sure everything was okay, which he hoped and prayed it was.

"Majesties, a late dinner I presume?", he greeted with a bow.

"Late for them, Oreius, we already ate", Lucy giggled taking a bit of pie and eating it. Susan glared at her and she just smiled.

Oreius smiled at this. "Of this I am glad."

"I actually wanted to talk to you, if you have a few moments", Peter wiped his mouth and looked at the general.

"Of course, how may I be of service?"

Peter took a small breath before saying, "Thank you."

Oreius blinked.

"For these past couple of trying days. Especially….." Peter paused once his gaze skittering away momentarily before continuing, "….for stopping me that day. I had lost my whole mind and then some, and if you weren't there…." He trailed off, not wanting to examine it too closely.

Oreius bowed once but his expression was grave, "I'm glad I could have been of service, but I apologize for going against you. I never wanted…."

"No." Peter spoke firmly every inch a High King, "I will not hear or accept an apology from you. You did the right thing. I had lost it and if, and I pray to Aslan it never is so…", here he glanced at his royal brother who had stop eating and was watching. He looked back at the centaur, "...but I also pray you have the strength to stop me like you did. I do regret even feeling such an emotion and I ask you to forgive me for failing you and Aslan."

Oreius shook his head, "You were grieving and was seeking a way to deal with it. No one would fault you for that. But I am glad to know that you regret such a response. It was not you, the High King that I know."

"And I don't want it to be."

"It is not, rest assured my King."

Susan and Lucy were beaming as the general and High King exchanged a small smile.

"General Orieus?"

Said centaur turned to face his other king.

Edmund held his eyes, unflinchingly, "I want to apologize for not telling you about the letters. In hind-sight I should have and I know you are probably upset, if your reaction during the trial hearing was any indication, so please speak your mind freely."

Orieus hesitated thinking upon his words before he spoke. The Kings and Queens waited patiently. Finally, he met King Edmund's eyes, "My King. I was upset that you did not let me know. This I cannot lie about. I would have done everything in my power to have assured your safety, had you come to me."

"I know."

"I must also asked for your forgiveness."

Edmund eyed him warily, "Why?"

Orieus looked a little shamed, "I must ask that you forgive me for not responding better when the attack happened. I regret..."

"Stop." Edmund's voice was firm and Orieus obeyed looking at him questioningly, "The same as my brother king, I too, will not accept or hear an apology from you. It was not your fault. It was mine. I did not trust you or my siblings enough to tell any of you. I did not trust myself or Aslan's faith in me to tell any of you. Instead I harbored it alone, when I need not have done so, and I paid the price." There was no sadness only acceptance of what happened to him.

"We paid the price", Peter couldn't help but amend, his face pinched at the memories.

Edmund glanced at him briefly before nodding and repeating, "We paid the price." He looked at the general, "I too must ask your forgiveness, for failing not only you, but our kingdom and my siblings. And failing Aslan." Here Edmund glanced around the table. "I am sorry that I didn't come to any of you. I know now I could have and should have and it wouldn't have been a problem as I perceived it to be. Forgive me for my stupidity."

High King Peter looked at Edmund, proud of what he had said. Susan and Lucy looked at him with happy tears in his eyes. They nodded at him, their forgiveness already written on their faces. Edmund looked back at Orieus, who looked rather stunned by what his king had said.

Slowly, a smile came to his face. He raised a hand to his chest and bowed low, "My King, if you need it, you have my forgiveness." He looked up and cocked his head, "If I may say, you're….different, majesty."

Edmund's eyebrows shot up, "I am?"

"Yes, of course you are. On this I agree, general", Peter nodded with great satisfaction as he looked upon his younger brother.

Lucy clapped her hands together, "Oh, oh, yes. I see it now. I see it!"

It took Susan a little longer but she smiled widely, "They are right."

Edmund couldn't help the frown as he looked at his siblings and the general. "What in Aslan's name are you all seeing?"

"I know not what I'm seeing, but it's a good change, your highness." Spoke the centaur.

"Well, I'm happy about that…." Edmund drawled.

Lucy cried, "The light of Aslan is finally in your eyes."

Edmund blinked. "It is? I would have thought it be there before, even though I never thought about a light of Aslan in my eyes or anywhere else."

"It's so bright."

Edmund was uneasy with all this, "You are creeping me out, sister Queen."

"You have finally gave it to Aslan."

Edmund looked at Peter who looked at him. They stayed like that for a long time. Susan and Lucy glanced between the two of them, and Oreius watched respectfully.

Edmund looked away after a moment, into space, trying to find the truth in Peter's words. He looked back at his older brother after a moment with a small telling smile. "I suppose I have."

"You have", Peter persisted.

Edmund gave a small smile, "Yes...I have."

Lucy and Susan started crying and suddenly, Edmund had an armful of sisters, one on both sides both cooing and crying.

"Okay, okay. Cut it out! I'm glad and all that, but please, get off me!"

Peter couldn't suppress his grin and he exchanged one with Oreius. After watching a moment longer reveling in such a wonderful sight, the general excused himself, walking out with a small smile and a feeling that things would be better than they had been before. Seems they would have more to celebrate than just a first year reign anniversary in the coming days.

After the Queens managed to collect themselves and get back into their seats and a ruffled Edmund was back to eating as was the High King who was amused, slowly pieces of the puzzle was given to the Queens and many of their questions were answered.

When Peter, who was telling most of the story, because Edmund didn't want to repeat it, got to the part about Edmund not feeling happiness, said male found himself once again with an armful of sisters. And since it was interrupting his pie, he felt slighted.

After all said and done, the Queens vowed to pay more attention and help their brother. Edmund was a little scared since that meant that he would have three siblings that would probably eye him every chance he get. He suppressed a groan at the thought but at the same time a true smile was in his heart.

_Thank you Aslan._

_You're welcome, dear son. _

And the siblings watched as Edmund absently smiled lightly. For him that was a mega-watt smile. How could they have missed that he never smiled much in the past year? When was the last time they had heard him laugh?

They vowed that this would not be the last time.

* * *

><p>The next day after breakfast the Kings and Queens holed up in the library deciding what course of action they should take regarding the assassinators.<p>

"Whatever we do, we must consult and pray that it's Aslan's will", reminded Lucy.

There were murmurs of agreement.

"I don't know that I want to think about this and come to such a hefty conclusion." Remarked Peter sighing as he closed a book, "I mean such a thing has never happened in Narnia as far as we know. So what do we based this on?"

"To think that such a thing could happen in Narnia and did is a sad thing", Lucy murmured quietly.

Edmund sighed, "But we still have to do our duty and figure this out. It's not easy but still..."

"Alright, let's go over this again." Susan ordered wanting to start from the top and work their way down again.

"Yes. The Minotaur and the old hag are fell beasts, through and through." Peter's voice was tight in anger.

"And the others?" worried Lucy, "They are…were Narnians", she amended after receiving a scowl from Peter, "Could they have been corrupted? Perhaps we can give them another chance."

Neither Susan nor Lucy understood the pointed look Peter sent Edmund's way and Edmund nodded in acknowledgement.

Edmund answered his voice soft, "Everyone has a choice. They chose what they wanted to choose. Part of me wants to give them another chance, because I was given a chance."

There was silence as they watched the thoughts flicker on their royal brother's face.

"Okay, if we gave them another chance….." Here Peter growled, making Edmund look at him, "I said, if, Peter. If, we give them another chance we have to reasonably be certain that if given another chance they would do what's right."

"But they think what they did was right", Peter's voice was tight, "And as far as I'm concerned, that Minotaur and the old hag are a lost cause right there. But Aslan is known to make miracles, yet at the same time all of them cursed Aslan in their own way. So as far I'm concerned they don't get to have another chance, but maybe I'm not the best person to ask." He looked meaningfully at Edmund.

Edmund gave a small smile, knowing what went unsaid. He sighed again. "I believe the that Minotaur and the old hag are barely, if so at all, redeemable."

"Praise Aslan, he sees that." Spoke Peter.

"So, we can reasonable say that if they were given another chance, they wouldn't do right."

"And they might would try again", whispered Peter, staring hard at Edmund as if he expected him to disappear right then.

There was an uncomfortable air that floated through.

"I kind of have to agree. We've seen how fell beasts are", Susan murmured.

Lucy squirmed, uncomfortable with this entire thing.

"Okay, let's forget the fell beasts for half a second", Edmund suggested, "Now what about the others. Especially, Geramius?" He looked around. Peter was pointly not looking at him. "Peter?"

Peter shook his head, his hand twitching, "I'm not going down that route. I just came from there. Every time I think about him, or the others just turned fell beasts, but mostly that...fawn..." Peter couldn't or wouldn't, he couldn't tell, use his name, "...my thoughts aren't good. Aslan help me, to maintain myself, in your name."

"In Aslan's name", muttered Lucy.

"But we have to think about it. What about him?" Edmund persisted.

Susan looked around the vast stacks of books and scrolls, "Isn't there something about treason in these books?"

"In other lands, sure but not here. At least nothing recorded." Answered Peter glaring at the table at the research as if it was their fault.

"So, we couldn't reasonably…" Edmund trailed off shivering.

"What?" Susan asked tensed.

Everyone else became tensed when Edmund didn't answer right away. In fact he looked a little sick. "Well, I thinking about…"

"Spit it out, Ed." Peter snapped.

"Look, I'm not saying we should or shouldn't but it should probably be on the table. Execution. There I said it."

"No!" cried Lucy, "You must not!" she looked around the room. Susan looked shocked at the notion. Edmund was still looking a little queasy and Peter was looking out the window in thought.

"You can't! We can't!" Lucy exclaimed in horror.

"Did the books say anything about such a thing?" asked Susan.

"Only in other countries, not under our rule such as Calormen, have used such a method." Peter muttered still deep in thought.

"And do we want to be recognized like that?" Lucy asked seriously appalled that they were even discussing such a thing, "It's crude and barbaric and I do not want our land to be associated thusly."

Peter turned away from the window and looked at Lucy, "But we never had such a thing happen in our land either, Lu. What would you do? What do you want to do about this?"

Lucy lifted their chin, "Let them go!"

"And reward their insolence!" Peter cried.

"No! Just let them go, wherever they wish but not in Narnia anymore. Maybe not even with our allies, if we could convince them of such a thing."

Peter scowled, "That's practically giving them the notion that we allow such a thing. They need to be punished."

"I will not soil my hands with blood. That is not the way. This isn't a battle or anything of honor."

"So if I give them a sword and then run them through, you'd be okay with that?"

"No!"

"Lucy, really. I understand your position, but we are all in a tough position here. This is not something that has honor. This is not honorable. Maybe we can't be honorable in our judgment because they were so dishonorable in their actions!" Peter jumped out of his seat and began pacing.

"Just because someone does unto you something bad does not mean you return that sentiment. Two wrongs don't make right!" Lucy stood up.

"They aren't giving us much choice! The way I see it, it boils down to three options and I hate this as much as all of you, okay. Let's settle that right now. Now, we can leave them to rot in jail, or we can exile them or we can execute them."

"Then leave them to rot, if you must."

"Yes, and what does that say about such treason? They tried to kill our royal brother, Lucy. They did, in fact", Peter glanced at Edmund as if to reassure himself he was still there before continuing, "Only by Aslan's grace does Edmund live. They tried to destroy the very rule of Narnia. There has to be a severe punishment here! A rap on the hand, isn't going to cut it and you know the other Narnians would not be pleased and nor would I."

"I know that, but Aslan can take care of them, far better than we can."

"But he left this to us! Do you see the dilemma here? If you have anything better, a sign from Aslan, something anything. I'm willing to go with that."

"Maybe he's waiting for us to…..oh, I don't know…." Lucy tried to rack her brain was coming up with nothing.

Ever the voice of reason Susan took this opportunity to break in as she stood up, "Okay, okay, let's all try to calm down. We are getting heated up. So let's take some tea and open a window and try to cool our heads, alright."

Lucy and Peter flopped back down in their respective seats as Susan passed out the tea that was laid out for them. Edmund had said nothing, throughout, his face ever pensive.

He looked up after a moment, "Let's take this from the top."

"I'm sick of top", quipped Lucy.

"Me too", Susan piped up.

"Okay, what's the top again?" Peter sighed.

"If we execute them, how are we any better than say the Calormens, who do that on a daily basis, from my understanding. They are quick to such a rash action. But if such treason merits it, then don't we have the right to order it?"

"Did you create life? Did you breathe life into someone?" asked Lucy wryly.

"No…what's that…."

Lucy nodded once, "My point exactly. You didn't give it and you have not right to take it."

"And what do you call war?" Peter asked.

"I don't like war, but I see the necessity. When you try hard to settle a dispute and it doesn't work and war is declared then we are just defending ourselves and our home but I don't like it. Never have and never will. But if we were to declare war all the time, I'd have a problem. But to just take a life like that so brutally without thought? Here's a question, if we execute them, who is going to kill them?"

Peter and Edmund squirmed at the idea of doing such a thing. Even Susan looked sick.

"Would we want to give such a heavy burden to someone else? Like Oreius maybe?" questioned Lucy looking around at the trio.

"No…no..no...", the three shook their heads viciously.

"I didn't think so."

"Okay, how about exile?" Edmund moved on.

"And risk the chance of them returning?" Peter asked.

"We could banish them from Narnia and perhaps try to get our allies to not allow them entrance in their countries either."

"And if they do return?" Susan questioned taking a sip of her tea.

"Pain of death?" Edmund offered up.

"And once again, if they come back you gonna kill them?" Lucy asked again.

Peter looked thoughtful, "That is a little bit more honorable. I mean it would be leaning towards the category of defending our keep."

"Yes, but would you feel comfortable killing them thusly?"

Peter deflated. He really wouldn't. He didn't like killing in wars or the time or two they got wind of a pack of fell beasts roaming in their country and they had to put a stop too. But he felt it was different. And if he could still look into Aslan's eyes after such a thing, then he would not question it. But he felt he might not be able to look into Aslan's eyes if he did this. Edmund and Susan felt the same way.

"Okay, and if we just leave them in the dungeons?" Edmund offered the third option of exploration.

"Not good enough punishment", snapped Peter.

"I kind of have to agree", Susan imputed.

"Sadly, as do I", Lucy added.

They all sighed. They were no closer into figuring out a solution then they were several hours ago.

"This is going nowhere!" Peter moaned.

"Maybe cause it doesn't have nowhere to go?" asked Edmund.

"Very funny."

Edmund shrugged and the sisters chuckled, but yes they were back to square one.

Quite a troubling thought.

**TBC…. **


	13. CH 12: Vengeance is mine, thus said

Disclaimer:  As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship.

A.N: I'm sad to say, we are coming down the the wire now. Next chapter the story ends. :( Awww...

But for now, the final say is...

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

* * *

><p>Chapter 12: Vengeance is mine, thus said.<p>

Quietness drifted throughout the library for a long time, everyone lost in their own thoughts. All of them going over their various options and as usually coming back to the same thing thus going in circles. Peter gazed out the window, Edmund had his arms and legs folded staring intently down into space. Lucy had slump in her seat, playing with her spoon. Susan sat regally looking into her long empty tea cup.

Still the heavy silence drew on...

.

.

.

"A difficult decision, have we?" came a familiar voice.

Everyone blinked and snapped to themselves; they stood up. Aslan was lying in a corner of the room, looking at them. Once the surprise wore off they all fell to one knee.

"Arise Kings and Queens of Narnia." Aslan spoke as he pushed himself onto his feet and walked forward a few paces sitting down on his haunches.

"Oh, Aslan we are so happy you are here! We've been wrestling with this and we still can't come to a conclusion. We don't wish to sully the name of Narnia or your name", Lucy spoke.

"And for that I am glad."

"What are we suppose to do? We are no closer to an answer than we were hours ago." Edmund asked gravely.

Aslan took a long look at Edmund. The others looked between the two.

"Well done, my son." Aslan spoke finally.

Edmund blinked confused, "Um, thank… you?"

Aslan chuckled, "You have learned much and you will finally be all you can be, King Edmund, the Just. I hope you remember all that you have learned in these last weeks."

Edmund blushed and lowered his head, pleased but embarrassed, and the girls giggled at this. Peter grinned. This made Edmund glared at his siblings.

"Worry not, my children, such a burden will not rest upon your shoulders. You have completed your duty."

"Aslan?" Lucy questioned confused as were the rest in the room.

They blinked and Aslan was gone. They looked around and at each other, trying to come to an understanding. All of them jumped when they heard the door bang open several minutes later.

"My lieges the prisoners have escaped!" Oreius galloped in his eyes automatically searching as guards filtered in positioning themselves in defensive positions.

"What are you talking about, general?" Peter questioned.

Oreius explained even as his eyes still searched the room, "I'm not sure, but the guards were rotating and the new guards saw that none of them were behind bars. I'm told that there was no possible way for them to get out, as the doors were locked and the walls were still intact. For all intent and purposes it looks as if no one had ever been there. I shall head down there momentarily and see what is happening for myself. In the meantime, I wish to post strict protection for your majesties."

The Kings and Queens blinked at this new and slightly disturbing news.

Lucy was faster at putting together the pieces. "Peace, Oreius calm down." Her voice was firm.

"My Queen?" Oreius questioned. He looked around as dawning comprehension was forming on the rest of his sovereign's faces. He felt he was missing something.

"Aslan was here."

Oreius straightened, "What was his will?"

Lucy smiled, "He has passed judgment on them as he should, because we cannot do such a thing. It is not our nature and we don't have the strength or will for such a burden. There is no way to know what would be the right course of action. But Aslan knows, because he knows everything, including the hearts of the assassinators. He knows what's best."

Oreius gave an nod and a slight bow. "So Aslan has taken care of them."

"Indeed", Peter smirked as the guards got the command from Oreius in a form of a nod and were exiting, "I'm glad, because I don't want to have to decide something like that. That's a little too close to….." he trailed off and everyone knew what he was thinking at that moment.

Lucy shook her head. "I cannot have that kind of power in my hands. It just doesn't feel right."

"I agree", Susan nodded.

"I'm just glad that I didn't have to decide fairly what to do. I mean, part of me want to curse them and then part of me wants to do great harm for what was done. Not for me, necessarily but for the pain it caused." Edmund's gaze swept across the room lingering on Peter, "But I don't want such a thing to weigh me down."

"Weigh any of us down", Peter gave a light smile of understanding.

"I'm glad that this has turned out for the better", Orieus spoke and the royal family voiced its agreements.

Comfortable silence lingered. "Oh yes, I am to remind you, your majesties. The big celebration will be in few days. But we can postpone….."

"We had the conversation before, Oreius", Edmund interrupted with a smile, "We continue as planned. I'm sure everyone needs a celebration right about now."

Peter threw his arms around Edmund almost knocking him to the ground.

"Watch it, Pete!"

"And of course we have another reason to celebrate", Peter muttered, sniffing.

"Yes, we do", Susan agreed as her and Lucy's eyes were getting misty. Oreius had backed out giving the family their time.

"Oh come on, don't go all crying on me again. I can't take it", Edmund groused.

Peter grinned, "I say bring on the celebration!"

"Hear! Hear!" the girls crowed.

"Oh, Aslan, help me!" Edmund cried out.

Laughter floated out into the hallway.

**TBC…. **

* * *

><p>A.N: Probably the shortest chapter I've written on this site, lol. But not much to say here. As said before we are coming down to the wire. Coming up the last chapter! :(<p>

I know it was a rather convenient way of dealing with the assassinators but honestly, could you really blame me? I would not want Narnia to sully their name by doing such things and in my head such a thing never really happened in Narnia, at least not during the Golden Age or before. I could see it happening when the Telmarines invaded Narnia, but even after Caspian X ascending the throne in later years I couldn't see something as harsh and crude as execution happening. Plus I really didn't want to deal with that in the world of Narnia.

It just seemed….wrong….. you know?

And you all know the arguments for the other punishments. It was going around in circles. So now you know my thoughts on that. Plus, again if you know some Bible, you might can catch some of the parallels here. In fact the whole chapter, plus the title is a direct parallel.

Though, I might could come up with a spin-off on what happened between Aslan and the assassinators….hm…

But perhaps that is better left to the imagination, though I'd love your thoughts on that.

Last chapter coming up... :(


	14. CH 13: He Brought me Home

Disclaimer: As much as I love Narnia, I don't own it. That honor belongs to CS Lewis. Disney, 20th Century Fox and Walden Media has more ownageship. Also I don't own the song Sade's: Bring me Home or the lyrics. I do own Sheris though.

A.N: Well, my fellow Narnians as I said before, this is the last chapter. I'm so glad for the response to this story. It's officially my most reviewed now! So thank you all for the review/alerts/favs! I'm hope you all had a great time reading this, as much as I did writing and re-editing this!

So without further ado, please enjoy the last chapter!

Summary: Takes place during the Golden Age. The most unthinkable has happened. Could some good come from such an act? Perhaps it would be enough to light the way home.

* * *

><p>Chapter 13: He Brought me Home<p>

The day of the celebration has dawned. The mood that hung in the air for the last week or so was quickly dispelling in the face of such joy. Everywhere decorations were up and had been for the past couple of days. The courtyard was being decorated and set up accordingly for the feast that would start in the evening and continue into the night. Everyone was excited and no official business was being held for the day.

Edmund was a little tense when he woke up. Try as he might, he was not a social person by any means. He just couldn't socialize well. He accept that so-called flaw in his personality and was even okay with it. But still this party tonight had him on edge. That and with recent events and his emotions still a little raw, he did not know what to expect.

Peter, Susan and Lucy watched Edmund closely as they did much of now, and they saw this tension that Edmund was trying to hide. It grew the closer they got to the start of the celebration. So by silent agreement, they corner Edmund an hour to the start of the party. They were all partly dressed in their garb for the night's events.

"Edmund, something you want to tell us?" asked Peter as he and his sisters joined Edmund on the balcony watching the last minute touch-ups below. The food was beginning to be rolled out and you could begin to smell it.

Edmund was startled out of his thoughts as he looked up at his older brother. He looked between Peter and his sisters. "Come again?"

"Edmund, something you want to tell us?" Peter patiently repeated.

Edmund looked a little confused. "Um…..I don't….think…so."

"No?" Peter asked looking at Edmund sternly, not amused.

"The three of you are going to have to give me some kind of clue or something."

"Let me ask it this way: Are you okay?"

"Of course, why wouldn't be?" Edmund answered.

"So we just….imagined the growing tension you have today?" Susan asked though it wasn't really a question.

Edmund sighed.

"Edmund, you said, you'd talk to us."

"And I shall, when I feel I need to talk."

"And that would be almost never", Lucy shot out.

Edmund rolled his eyes.

"Don't roll your eyes at us. If we don't look, watch and push you'll just bottle it up again. Whether consciously or sub-consciously, you will", stated Peter.

Edmund took a breath and look back at the garden. Many Narnians were beginning to show and mill about. He look at the beach. This particular garden opened to the ocean were the naiads could join in as well. He could see some naiads and water spirits milling about.

"Edmund, please. I know it's hard for you." Susan coaxed.

Edmund shook his head, "Today is wonderful day", he looked back at his siblings, "I would have all of you happy today."

"Why didn't I hear an us, in that to include him?" Peter asked his sisters, "Or perhaps, I'm a little deaf, did you hear it include him, per chance, dear sisters?"

Lucy shook her head, her curls bouncing around her face, "I didn't."

"You're right. Peter. We all must be deaf", Susan answered Peter but was looking at Edmund.

"Must be. Pity", Peter added looking back at Edmund.

Edmund sighed again and couldn't help but roll his eyes again. "Good grief, you guys can be such a pain."

"We care Edmund, please understand that", Susan spoke gently.

Edmund nodded, "I do. And I'm glad. I thank Aslan for all of you everyday, but you have to understand something. There will be things I need to deal with myself. Please, allow me that. I promise if it gets be too much, then I'll come to you."

The siblings stared at Edmund ascertaining his statement.

"I will hold you to your word", Peter spoke regally, every inch the High King.

Edmund dipped his head once in response.

* * *

><p>Once the Kings and Queens were introduced the celebration quickly became more festive as time went on. There was an elegant toast by a Lady Swan that almost moved even Peter to tears. Edmund would deny to his dying day, that his eyes misted over.<p>

Afterwards, the music was brought out to play and the food was a free for all, with plenty more where that came from.

Laughter of all forms ranged out as various music played. Lucy was alternating between dancing and talking with the dryads. Sometimes a naiad or two dropped by. Susan were talking to some foxes. Peter had a goblet of wine and was talking to Sir Giles Fox. Edmund had his own goblet and tossed comments in every once in awhile.

Many Narnians circled to give their congratulations to the various monarchs for the first year reign that passed. Edmund was secretly surprised at the amount of heartfelt congrats he got. For the first time he saw that there were many more Narnians that he realized actually cared about him. It eased some of the tension he felt previous. He had expected to feel more of the pressure of being in a crowd unbearable, but it wasn't. He didn't feel as if he was completely in isolation. He didn't feel as if no one wanted him around.

Peter was happy as he overheard some of what their cousins were saying to his brother. But it wasn't until a cat similar to one of the cats that were in the in conspiracy came up to Edmund.

"My King. My name is Sheris", he introduced bowing to Edmund.

Edmund nodded and gave a small smile, "Well met, dear cousin. I pray you having a wonderful time."

"Indeed", he shifted from one foot to another and wouldn't look Edmund in the eye.

"Perhaps, you have something on your mind. What is it?" Edmund asked gently.

"I wanted to apologize, my King."

Peter stopped his conversation and turned around listening. Sheris, saw this and glanced at Peter who had the warning look of 'tread cautiously'.

Edmund was cool and calm as he asked, "And in what way have you wronged me, that warranted such an action?"

"The cat most like me, that was in that horrible plot, he was my older brother."

"I'm sorry", the Just King meant it.

"Nay, my King, I am sorry. For I was supposed to be part of the plot as well." He confessed quietly.

Somehow that got around and the music stop playing and everyone was watching. Peter twitched as the Queens rejoined them.

"Were you? What happened?" Edmund asked his voice devoid of infliction.

Sheris shifted on his paws uncomfortably looking at the ground. Oreius was standing nearby watching him with near unblinking eyes. "I was one of the ones, that wasn't pleased when you were crowned King." Here he stopped.

Edmund spoke easing him along, "Please, freely speak your mind. This is the only way, we'll get to the bottom of this."

Wisely, the High King and the Queens stayed out of this, but they were watching and listening very closely.

"As you wish, my King", Sheris intoned and seemed to gather his courage, "In fact, I came to hate you but not as much as my bother Keris. He would rail against you day in and day out. Then one day, he was gone a lot. I knew not where, until he came in one day and asked me if I hated the Just King. I said I did. And he asked what if we could get rid of him? I remember I was stunned at this, because while I hated you never did my thoughts lead to your death. I asked him what he meant, and he boasted that there was a plot to kill you. I shocked to say the least. I asked him if he was part of it and he answered yes, with such joy it began to sicken me. He asked me to join in but I found I could not. I pleaded with my brother to see reason. He would not. He firmly believe that you had to be killed."

"You knew of this plot and said nothing. Why?" the High King asked, demanding an answer.

"My lord, I was a coward, this I know. I panicked and told my brother I would not be part of it. He just laughed in my face and said I already was, by association because I knew about it. Then he hit me and told me if I told, he would personally see to it that I come up missing. We have not any parents, they died long ago, so it is just me and him. He practically raised me. I admit I was too scared, too much of a coward to stand up against him, even at the cost of my life." Sheris shuddered once, "But then when word got around that you….." He paused, "I felt so guilty then. I felt if I had said something, it might have done good, but instead I let fear and fear of retribution from my brother still my paws. It is a shame I will bear for all eternity."

"And yet you came forward. You didn't have to. So why did you?" asked Edmund.

Sheris looked up squarely into Edmund's eyes at this, "I was there that day of the trial. And I saw my brother there. He spoke and still he was set in his ways. And then when the High King raged, as he should have.", here the cat's eyes shifted to the High King and he gave a small bow before looking directly back at Edmund, "I had already felt bad but as he raged, I felt guiltier and guiltier. I felt as if I pulled that arrow myself. I could not stand the fact that by merely thinking such thoughts, I had insulted Aslan himself. I had never thought of it that way, and it scared to think I had slipped that far. I do not wish to do anything to displease Aslan, so I lay my judgment at your feet. Whatever you want me to do, I'll do it. Not for your forgiveness, for I deserve it not, but because I want someone to help me back to the right path, though I don't deserve even that."

The crowd was silent as all eyes were on the spectacle. Peter's, Susan's and Lucy's eyes all turned on their brother who was looking at Sheris, perhaps seeing things they could not see.

At length he finally spoke, every inch the Just King, "You deserve much, my cousin. It took courage and strength of will to even come to me like this. I see you're sorry and guilt for such a thing. Perhaps you feel you don't deserve my forgiveness but the thing is forgiveness can be freely given. And you have that from me. I know Aslan would be proud of you. Seek his forgiveness, then let us put this behind us. A new slate. Everyone wavers off the beaten path at times, and there is nothing wrong with asking for help. Asking for a hand or paw to guide you back to that path, you deserve that."

Tears were in Sheris eyes as he listened, in awe of this young king. Why did he hate him in first place? Maybe in part because of his brother, but he saw now he should have came to his own conclusions.

"Never think for one moment you don't. Go with a light heart and do not be troubled any more. Your brother's actions are not your actions. He had to deal with the consequences of his own actions. Don't let your brother's actions burden your shoulders, my friend. That has nothing to do with you and I won't compare you to your brother or judge accordingly based on that. It has no merit. The next we meet I hope it will be in friendship, Sheris."

Sheris was stunned but he managed to collect himself and bowed deeply, "My King, I know not why I even hated you in the first place. I see now so clearly the wisdom of Aslan's choice. I bless you a thousand times and over. You are truly a blessing to Narnia. If you would have me, I will be your devoted servant."

Edmund smiled once, "I hope we could be friends."

"If you find me worthy of such an honor, then I would gladly call you a friend."

Edmund's smile widen, "This pleases, me great cousin."

Sheris still in awe and stunned, gave another bow before walking off. There was a moment's pause while everyone digested what happen. Edmund looked around, "Please, don't let me keep you from this celebration. Please continue!"

It took a moment longer before joyous music re-filled the air once more and now all conversation was directed on what happened. Edmund turned around in his seat facing the table behind him and gave a relieved sigh. "Dear Aslan….." he murmured.

"Wonderful job, brother. You handled that well!" Peter tipped his goblet towards him.

Lucy hugged Edmund. "Oh, it was wonderful. You waxed eloquence!"

"When doesn't he?" Susan asked giving Edmund a quick hug.

"Come join in a celebratory dance!" Lucy suggested merrily.

Edmund glared without heat at his little sister, "You know very well, I don't dance and I don't like to dance."

Lucy pouted, "Just once, the fawns are gonna dance! And Mr. Tumnus is going to give me basics on playing his flute. He got me one just like his! I'm so excited! Oooh, they are fixing to start. I gotta run. Love you guys, great job, Edmund…", here she gave him a quick peck on the cheek, "…but I will see you guys later!" And with that she ran over to her little group.

"If you guys will excuse me", Susan chuckled and made a more graceful exited.

When Edmund turned around in his seat, he found many more Narnians wanted to sing his praises. He glared at Peter when he noticed his older brother slipping way with his goblet in hand, leaving him on his lonesome. He was unused to such high praise. Apparently Sheris set a trend, because throughout the evening, some of the Narnians came up to apologize for even feeling so against him. Apparently, High King Peter must have channeled some of Aslan during his rage, because many of the Narnians expressed deep regret by the time Peter and the trial was over. Edmund pardoned them after listening to them, sending them feeling better then they had in a long time.

Perhaps this day was bring much more than Edmund had expected.

"Your brother has done well this night", Oreius remarked stepping up to Peter who was leaning on a tree watching his brother talk to a group of young squirrels.

Peter took a sip of his wine, "Indeed. I'm really proud of him. He's grown so much in the past week and some..." His voice trailed off.

Oreius looked down, "Are you okay, my King?"

Peter looked up at Oreius, "I'm fine. Why do you ask?"

The general picked his words carefully, "Between the start of all of this and now, you have been through much."

Peter nodded absently, before looking back at his brother who got into a spontaneous hug with a bunch of squirrels. He chuckled softly at the picture. He could picture the eager squirrels all jumping at him for a hug.

"He's happier now. Even I can see this. He has grown in this short time." Oreius stated.

"And for that reason alone, I bless the name of Aslan."

"Perhaps some good has come out of all this."

Peter nodded, "Yeah, good has come out of it."

"Even the desert has flowers."

Peter slowly looked up at Oreius his mouth constantly twitching.

The centaur looked down at Peter with a raised eyebrow, "My King?"

"I'm sorry, Oreius, but this is the first time I even heard anything resembling flowery speech come out your mouth."

Oreius looked pleased, "We centaurs do love good poetry from time to time."

"You are poetry in motion in battle; I agree with that and can see that. But you will have to forgive me if I can't see you sitting down reading a poetry book. Waxing your sword, yes, but not poetry."

Oreius gave a hearty laugh, "You have much to learn about me, my King."

Peter grinned up at him, "I look forward to it", he held up his goblet before taking a drink. He looked back up to see Edmund sneaking back into the castle.

"I see your brother has decided to run away", the general noticed amused.

Peter handed him his goblet which Oreius took, "And I have to catch said wayward little brother."

Oreius inclined his head, and Peter returned it before walking with purpose back to the castle. He saw Susan look at him questioning and he gave her a reassuring look. Lucy also looked up from her spot with the fawns, also questioning and Peter gave her the same look.

* * *

><p>Edmund breathed a sigh of relief as he managed to slip back into the palace and down the hall. His nerves had about all he could take at the moment. He needed a little break. So much had happened and he needed a moment to collect himself and think. He turned and found himself back on the balcony he was on earlier that day. His eyes searched the Narnians below.<p>

He quickly found Lucy, who was laughing at something Tumnus said while explaining the flute to her. He saw Susan dancing with the dryads. Out at sea, he saw the naiads and various water spirits doing acrobatics in their own dance, lighting up the sky, directing his attention to the stars that were twinkling and the full moon that reflected on the sea. It was a truly a breath-taking sight and Edmund found himself enjoying it.

But try as he might, he couldn't spot Peter.

"I thought I'd find you here", the voice of the one he was looking for cut into his thoughts.

Edmund looked up as Peter joined him, leaning on the railing.

"Gorgeous, isn't it?" asked Peter after a few moments of silence had passed.

Edmund nodded still looking up at the stars, trying to spot any constellations.

Peter nudged him bringing him back to the present. He looked at his older brother as he asked, "You okay?"

Edmund nodded slowly but didn't say anything.

Peter didn't press as he looked up at the sky.

"Just…" he heard Edmund start then stop.

The older brother made sure to keep his voice light, "Just….?" He look back at Edmund who was playing with his fingers.

"Oh, nothing really. Just a little overwhelmed I guess. I did not expect any of this, that had happened, you know? I just need to get away for a moment and clear my head."

Peter was overjoyed that Edmund had shared even that much with him. It was progress. He nodded, "I'm shocked as well. I didn't expect Sheris, or any one for that matter to do that." He glanced over the lawn were many were milling about, "Seems time for a new beginning." He added.

Edmund looked at him then slowly nodded looking away, "Yeah, it is. More ways than one it seems."

There was a pause before Edmund ventured forth his voice soft, "You know, I never felt I belonged anywhere."

Peter looked at Edmund's profile waiting and hoping that Edmund would continue his train of thought. He waited patiently without pushing and was awarded.

"In England, I never felt as if belonged. You, Lucy and Susan always had an easier time in life and now I can be grateful for that. But back then, I was angry and jealous and started down my own path's destruction. Coming to Narnia was the best thing that happened to me and now I can say that and actually mean it. From the White Witch to now, Narnia is still the best thing. I know the White Witch will haunt me, but like you said, don't let it overpower you", here he gave a small smile.

Peter returned it but said nothing.

Edmund continued, "But I look out here…" he looked back at the all the creatures from land to sea. From tree to rock, "And for the first time, I feel like maybe I'm part of them."

"As you should." Came the soft reply.

"I know that we came from England but honestly…."

Edmund was silent so long that Peter nudged him gently, wanting him to go on and hoping he would.

Edmund gave him a small smile, "Honestly, this place is the most like home. And never in my life have I felt like I had a place to call home. And it feels good."

Peter beamed at him.

Edmund shrugged, "Aslan brought me home."

Peter laughed and threw his arm around Edmund's neck, "Yea. He brought all of us home."

Edmund laughed once, just as popping could be heard. Their heads snapped to the source and found colors lightening over the sea.

"Fireworks", Peter grinned.

"Hey!" came a call.

Peter and Edmund looked around and saw Lucy waving like mad. They both laughed and waved back. Many of the Narnians called out to both Kings and waved at them.

Edmund laughed again as another bout of fireworks lit up the sky along with the mermaids jumping out the water.

Peter never heard a sweeter sound. Lucy and Susan were beaming with some happy tears in their eyes at such a relax posture Edmund had and the happiness he radiated.

Indeed they were home.

_I'm far away from God  
>My tears flow like a child's in need of love<br>I've cried the tears  
>So build the fire and light the flame<em>

_Bring me home_

**FIN.**

* * *

><p>A.N: Awww, it's over. I don't know that I've felt this sad about a story ending like I did this one. :(<p>

But some final thoughts: Like I mentioned in the prologue that I'd share what the ingredients that prompted this story was for anyone who wanted to know: I wanted it to take place in the Golden Age for sure. It goes without saying I wanted some PeterEdmund brother bonding as well as offshoot sibling bonding. Then somewhere in there I wanted to parallel Lazarus in the Bible with Edmund dying and coming back three days later….which of course lead to Edmund angst I love so well. And somewhere in there I really wanted to play with the fact that it may have taken many Narnians to come to respect Edmund much less learn to love him and accept him, which of course was another angst plot I wanted to cover. He's such an indepth character and I feel much can happen with him. But in the beginning that was all I had. It took probably 5 or 6 tries but it finally came together.

More so than I expected. Cause some of the story plots; I never really saw happening until it happened.

Some Fun facts: Originally this story was to be titled, Lazarus Rising, but once the story got going it seemed a bit stale of a title and the story encompass so much more than that. That and part of the story was given away in the title. Not that I mind, if the story didn't bloom so much like it did.

But when I was writing this last chapter, I was listening to Sade's Bring Me Home and it seemed to fit Edmund. So if asked, what is the theme song or credit song of this story that would be it. I love music, and I can't help but equate things with music. Which is why some of my stories have been known to have some kind of music or theme song attached at times.

Plus, I was thinking about it and Edmund was "brought home" spiritually, mentally and physically. So the more I thought about it the more the title made more sense.

To me at least.

FYI: If I do decided to do a mini-spin-off about Aslan and the assassinatiors, I'll upload it as an epilogue in this story.

Oh, yeah, and I hope everyone have a Happy 4th of July!

Thanks so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed the ride!

For Aslan and Narnia!


End file.
